Both my sister and I kind of dread family get to gethers. At least we both have one sibling whom we cn relate to.

Being gay though, I have met many who have "chosen fmilies" rather than relying on their biological families. Blood may be thicker in water, but I think people can drown much faster if enersed in blood.

We have one brother who lives in Kansas (he actually likes it there, because they are his kind of people), who my sister and I see as beign a person who only brings problems into the family. I hve never goent o visit him, because I would nto enjoy his company, as he is a far right wing conservative, Mormon, hypocrite and racist and not too terribly bright.

Sometimes it is better to just let come bllod relations drift away for your own peace of mind. My measure for friends and family is simple. I ask does this person bring more happiness and good into myu life than misery and unhappiness? If they weigh heavier on the side of misery and huhappiness, if a "friend" I cut htem off, and if family i let them drift away.

Everyone has an estranged families in thier own right
See control comes in to play again is indoctrine in us to control others

Yes. My family seems disapproving of much of what I do..my diet of health food, my insisting on natural healing methods, the people I choose to date, my assertion that I'm partial transmale, my running off to Thailand to teach ESL, etc. But my belief in their disapproval no doubt causes/contributes to it.

If I didn't pay any attention to their insults, or just laughed them off, it might be OK, but I saw some emails they sent to each other about me, and their comments were so unexpectedly cruel and hateful that I lost interest in being around them. Every time I've considered trying harder to relate to them, I remember the stuff they said about me, and feel sick.

But my remembering those things is probably the only reason that bad vibration is still around. Paying attention to it keeps it in play.

Yes, I realized at an early age that something just wasn’t right with my parents. They were very negative and belittling, cold and absent. Communication was never a strong suit and nurturing was pretty much non existent. I left them, and my home country at age 19. Best thing I could have done. Happy to visit and love them from afar and in small doses is doable but still highly stressful for me.
Toxic people and as Rumi says...“Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames”...so I did.

I don't have friends as such, but I have lots of younger people around me.
I have abrother who has destroyed our family, I will not have anything to do with him, my mother blames me because I am the one refusing to talk to him whereas he says he will talk to me. He is crude, disgusting and abusive, 56 years old has worked twice in his life for less than 6 months each time, inherited some money and drugged it all away, this enabled him to get on a disability pension at 22, and also claim on a disability insurance policy, enough to buy him a unit, but no, more drugs. He lives in the family home which has been bequeathed to him. My youngest brother shops for him, takes him to the dentist etc because my mother insists, and now my youngest brother is resentful that I don't do any of it. (I am also interstate). It is easier to pretend they don't exist. I keep dealings minimal and no longer feel bad about it.

Stupid stuff. Ex remarried, wife & I emailed frequently, got along great at gatherings, then after several years she blew up directly at me at a family meal because I gently suggested that the toddler she'd just Chewed Out had not been in error. Now gatherings are separate, son & family with them & me not, plus the ex & wife ( my DIL talks) are critical of our adopted daughter who desperately wants her father's love. (There's nothing wrong with her- she's delightful, stable, works, has her own family, is a terrific mom). It's a story of their making, exclusion that asks nothing of them relative to patience, reaching out & acceptance of others. I suspect the wife had issues all along of having to share my ex as well as not being the mother of his children. Build a bridge & get over it. I keep mouth firmly shut.

My daughter stopped talking to me over 2 years ago when I left her father. I waited until she was 18 to leave and I was a good mom to her. She only sees his heartache and knows nothing of the heartache and sadness I endured for many years. It has been soul-crushing to not have her in my life and still is. I wish I had a solution. I have already tried different ways to resolve it, to no avail. She has blocked me and sides with him. She is almost 21 now. It kills me to not be able to speak to her or give her a hug.

Semi-estranged. My 90 year old mother lives in FL-my sister is always flying down, they went on a cruise together, always cutting me out. I see my mom once a year when she flies up to stay at a hotel near my sister. Dysfunctional family what can I say?