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Are you a "touchy-feely" person? How about your family?

I'm a bit standoffish with acquantinces. But, with people I know very well, I do touch and hug a lot.

One side of my family does a lot of hugging and touching. The other side, not at all.

How about you?

silvereyes 8 Apr 3
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49 comments

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7

Depends on how drunk I am

7

I'm very touchy feely, and so is my family. I think some of it is cultural, and some is just because I enjoy expressing myself.

5

Touchy and feely here. Very tactile. =]

5

I'm not touchy-feely at all. I'll give someone close to me a hug, somewhat begrudgingly, but that's about it. Considering how averse I am to touch, it's rather astounding that I ever even lost my virginity. ?

5

Family - one hug on arrival - one hug on the way out.

More than that is way too much for my formally sexually abused self. I am freaked out by people who are touchy.

In the right situtation it's just fine.. But don't be grabbing me unexpectedly.
Always ask if it's a friend. You never go wrong with asking.

Also one nephew who is an Aspie - I always ask him before a hug.

I've learned to ask people if I can give them a hug and I'm totally fine if they say no.

Also my favorite new anecdote. I have a friend that I've tried to explain the touch thing to - she definitely doesn't get it. We're out and about - I got into a bank - come back out and sit down.

Me: "What the heck did I sit on? Ouch.".

Her: "Nothing there? IDK?"

Me "Gees am I sitting on my phone?"

Her: "I can't find the car keys."

Suddenly she is fishing under my arse with her hand -

Me: "What are you DOING?!"

Her: "Looking for the keys" also...
"Oh I forgot you don't like being touched!"

Me: You've got your entire hand under my ass - I'm pretty sure ANYONE would be upset by that!".

Just gees.....

4

I had parents who were not physically affectionate, so I grew up with a hunger for that. I've had husbands and lovers who may not have started that way, but converted quickly. It was interesting to me that my parents became that way later in their lives.
My children are very touchy-feely, too, but I only see them a few times a year.
Warning: If I ever meet you, you're gonna get a hug.

4

I'm very touchy-feeling and is my family. It didn't really dawn on my that not everyone is going to be thrilled to have a hug from me until I was in college. That's where I first encountered people with large personal spaces. I had to really learn to reign it in. I'm especially bad if I've had a few cocktails.

I recently saw a video on how to avoid hugs. It had different moves for different types of hugs. Freaking hilarious. I posted it on my Facebook page stating if anyone wanted to avoid a hug from here, here is how to do it.

4

I am a massage therapist so putting my hands on people is just a natural extention of my career

I use a doorframe and it works wonders at no cost

@silvereyes I'm right here

4

My family, ie. siblings, not so much. Me, hell yeah! I touched a woman's shoulder last night while talking to her, and we had met last night (I didn't grope her like President 45 mentioned). I got a hug from my dance instructor on Monday. I have a female friend that gives me a VERY warm hug. (THAT touches my soul!) I love to give hugs if the women are receptive to the idea! I know not all are.

4

I think I can express this in song....ahem....me me me me meeeee:

4

My default setting is huggy but I watch for cues with others & let them choose whether to first or not. My family is hug on arrival, random and certainly on departure. /from the south if that matters

4

I wasn't... then I got married and my wife changed that right quickly. 🙂

Meaning that she was, and she liked to hold hands in public and maybe hug or certainly stand close in public. We did and I grew to like it.

Though, please, when I have both hands full, please let me scratch my nose on occasion. 🙂

4

I'm a physical touch/quality time kind of person.

4

Yes. I love holding hands, running my fingers through hair, laying my hand on a leg in the car, love to cuddle...I could go on I guess. But you get the point lol.

4

A good question. I'm big on permission, so I won't touch someone unless I know they will be comfortable with it. Me? I must have been a cat in a previous life, I love to be touched. That, and using someone's name, are a main line directly to someone's soul. I tend to think I'm an open book, but I respect other's privacy. Still and all, someone brushing my hand with their own is powerful.

4

I'm the same, I need to know someone pretty well to be touchy-feely.

4

I'm the same. With people I know well and love, I like to give hugs, touch hands, affectionate contact such as that. With people I don't know or casual acquaintances such as colleagues, it's virtually unimaginable.

Jnei Level 8 Apr 3, 2018
4

Touchy feely here

3

Heart says yes, restraining orders say NO!

3

My birth family is not at all touchy feely, no hugs etc, neithrr was my ex wife, and neither am I.
Except with my kids, and they are demonstrably affectionate.

3

I didn't grow up in an affectionate home, until my parents started vacationing in Hawaii, where a hug of aloha is pretty much obligatory and is a habit that catches on fast. Now that I live here in Hawaii too, it's common to give pretty much any acquaintance a kiss or hug. For my clients (usually mainlanders or europeans) I wait to see if they are huggy kissy or the shake hands type.

For anyone new that I meet, I just smile and offer my hand. But 2nd time meeting, there is usually a hug. *Though I am very adamant about not giving hugs without invitation, especially to children - and not inviting hugs from men who get too touchy feely!

For my grandchildren... well the phrase "I could just eat them up" comes to mind. I only see them a few times a year, so I'm pretty affectionate during those times.

3

I'm getting more accustomed to physical contact. A few years ago, a coworker of mine was shocked because I gave her a hug after her father and uncle died, and her mother was diagnosed with a terminal illness within a week and a half. I had known her for about ten years then.

JimG Level 8 Apr 3, 2018

Yes for extreme sadness I definitely have a default setting and would do that. (I'd ask first though). It's a weird world we live in.

3

I have been only with a limited few, mostly, though, I don’t want to touch humans.

i do get touchy-feely with my dogs, though. They’re great!

3

Hugs are cheap and they make a difference to a lot of people. Yes I hug... but no on touch. There are particular types of hugs females should be aware of. Ladies... look it up and learn it. I show them to new ladies in AA & NA. there is a lot of hugging going on in there. There's also bad guys in there too. There's a need to block their over eager hugs. I hug with only one arm and it's a side hug that keeps females front away from me. It also protects me when people see me hug. Touching arms, hands, any part of another person's body is off limits. You'll never see me cross that line. Of course it's different with my wife.

3

Just with my girlfriends and family.

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