You look beautiful in both. However, I prefer the before But all that really matters is what you think

lighter looks better.

I don't care what people look like, I am more interested in who they are. I don't wear makeup most of the time, and I might lighten my hair from time to time because I can and I'm a natural blond. I'm also overweight, and I acknowledge I'm not a show horse, I'm more of a plodding plow horse. If someone doesn't like what I look like I seriously reconsider my relationship to them. I wouldn't regard them as friends, as in "with friends like that..." Life is too short, I am going to put my energy into things that really matter, at least what really matters to me.

It's crazy how so many people are obsessed with hair color. My hair is a mousy brown, with copper and silver mixed in. Most of the men in my life wished I had blonder hair, but then I'd have to keep touching it up. Did that for a year or so, and I thought it was a superficial thing I didn't really need to keep up.

Now I've got a silver streak in my hair that I touch up with brown spray for the illusion of youth, in part, but also because my hair line is receding a bit on the sides.

I've considered making "blonde' streaks in my hair to match most of my acquaintances my age who have beachy hair, but it's not really me. So I just keep it my natural color except for the silver that is creeping in.

Just be you - and don't worry what others think. That's my philosophy. The softer brown looks nice, but so does the black. Do whatever makes you feel "you" is how I feel.

A beautiful heart shows through no matter what color hair or even how much of it. We are lucky that we live in a world where we can have whatever kind of hair color or thickness we like, and still let our true selves show through.

Hair - lack of, color of, quality of or quantity of - is like many things all in the eye of the beholder and owner of.
I use to have much thicker and very curly hair. I would use a blow dryer to tame it into lusciousness - soft curls with major shine and red highlights. The red highlights I got from my Dad who was a carrot top red turning more auburn as he aged.
The following happened within an hour of waking up one morning:
My dryer quit and I had to get to work, so it air dried.

1. My mom said I looked like a witch. Shrug, meh, off to work I go.
2. The guy I'd been dating and who had asked me to marry him took one look at my natural and freed hair and said, "I won't be seen in public with you looking like that". Fine, you don't have to. Bye-ee !
3. I get to work and the guy I worked with goes, "All righttt, Dee's gone funk-ay!
   People tire me out.
   NOW, I cut my own hair, no color, no straightening - the dry air on the east side of the mountains takes care of that - just enough curl to give the thinning hair body and I get people asking who does your hair.
   People still tire me.

I find it difficult to sympathize with people who can choose between beautiful and more beautiful. Many of us live in a world where no mention is ever made of our appearance.

Those friends remind me of my (much loved) grandmother who once told me I was too old to be wearing my hair long. I was 27. Eye roll. Except for a couple of years ago when I had a problem with hair loss (probably from being under anesthetic six times in a year), I still wear it long.

You look outstanding either way, and I envy your thick, rich hair. It's fun to experiment, but you'll feel your best when you like your hair, so what do you think of it?

My late partner had shortish, very thick, black hair. One time I made the comment she was developing a racing stripe. Then she would dye it. She used a natural dye with a henna base. It would last 6 months before the racing stripe appeared. One thing worth mentioning there is a product Shikal which highlights hair so you don't have to get dyed as often. [shikai.com]
Hows your thumb?

Nice