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Why don't men actually READ and pay attention to women's profiles before sending "I think we'd be a good match" messages? Stating that you are "willing to relocate" sounds desperate. And, no, I'm not your Engish teacher, so don't post a profile full of spelling and grammatical errors that makes me want to take my professorial pen to it.

tucsonkosmicgirl 5 June 7

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Hahaha! SO FUNNY! I want to learn Engish as well! Can u teech me? Or am I doing it already.


That's funny, I always thought someone who is willing to relocate, is someone who is seriously searching, and is willing to explore possibilities outside their immediate area.

But what do I know ?


Sarcasm,not mean to be mean,just an observation.[]


That's a curious post. I think you're being mostly serious, though. I get the idea that you're attracting and rejecting men at the same time. You seem to be telling men that you're open to meeting somebody but you are so accomplished you don't need anyone. Even if they have a talent for something, such as cooking, you will reject that talent. If you're discouraging men who are less academic than yourself, that's probably a good thing, unless he happened to be a very special person.


"You seem to be telling men that you're open to meeting somebody but you are so accomplished you don't need anyone." THIS is what you need to learn to understand. Strong women don't NEED another person to complete them; though they may WANT someone to spend time with. Being particular in what you desire is known as being discerning.


Honestly, I don’t think shaming men is going to help your mission here. I also read your It is possible to weed out non-intellectuals who message you with kindness and tact. Just my two cents.

Asking people to READ is not a matter of "shaming" anyone. I wouldn't message someone who's profile I hadn't read, or someone who was clearly not interested in someone like me. Claiming that we are compatible based on just a picture demonstrates extreme shallowness. I know what I'm looking for, and don't need anyone's approval.

@tucsonkosmicgirl Alrighty then. 🙂


Where's your sense of adventure ? What's wrong with relocating if the right path leads you ?
Others would be okay with that.

She's jyst angry because she has not been lucky in love ?

I'm not interested. Others may be, but my decisions are mine.

@VAL3941 Where did you discern anger in that post? Do you deem every women who is firm in her convictions as angry?

Did you not discern the lightness in the remark ? Sorry I did not put a smiley behind it !


Cool down ! We are not all the same and neither are women ! You are suffering from delusions of grandure ?   See I can't spell either !!!

For someone who accused the original post of evincing anger, you certainly are heavy on the exclamation points. Perhaps you should take your own advice and cool down.

Ok. Will do and thanks .


The thoughtful reading type may have a tendency to be very selective about the people they message.


Read your profile.The one thing you don't sound like is fun. You may not be my English teacher, but you sound like every teacher l have ever known. ☺

That's because I've devoted 26 years of my life to teaching students. Thus the reason I want to spend my time with other academics.

@tucsonkosmicgirl I've spent most of my adult playing music for a living, but most of my friends are not musicians. That makes for a very cloistered and uninteresting life. While there is knowledge to be found in books, there is very little life. Like Woody Allen said, "Those that can't do teach, those that can't teach, teach gym." ☺

@Sticks48 : And those who use cliches are frequently unimaginative and uncreative. I'm perfectly happy with my fun academic friends.

@tucsonkosmicgirl l have been around academic people. A lot of cliches are based on facts. That is how they become cliches. Some change as they become out dated, because truths can change. ☺


Some women's profiles are too long, shortening them up makes a better impact of yourself.

If one is too lazy to read a profile, then one is not worth investing time.


The same guys don't write profiles or answer profile questions either. Just hit "block" and move on.


So you're not an English Teacher?🙂🙂🙂 . You're way out of my league . I chose some hard and some dangerous jobs (: it kept me humble and it was fun🙂 I'm new at this.My wife liberated me 6yrs ago and I sent my last daughter off 2yrs ago (she turns 20ys tomorrow) I live on a small cdn. island west of Bellingham Wa.Yesterday I thought about getting a dog (unconditional love and all that) but I really like people . Enjoy🙂 Lloyd

I love that expression 'my wife liberated me'. I can relate completely. I first came across the idea, not the expression, in a book called 'The Chimney Sweeper's Boy' about a woman who was married to a closet homosexual for decades. He manipulated their two daughters against her. When he dies, the book surprised me by describing how free she felt after years of his abuse. Surprised, because everyone expects widowed people to be miserable. The same can apply to separated people.

@brentan Well described . I can recall the feeling of being weightless , of gliding through the air , when I separated from my husband and more specifically got free of his mother , as if a great weight had been lifted from me .

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