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Damn, I have a huge crush on my boss. Sometimes I feel that he feels the same and sometimes he's cold knowing that he had a break-up from his girlfriend around two months ago. I'll be moving to a different department shortly. Do you think there's hope in this? 😓

Dreamer777 5 June 28
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1

If you're moving to another department and he's no longer going to be your direct supervisor, I'd say make the first move and see where it goes.

Just know that work place relationships can be risky. If things eventually go off the rails, you still have to work in the same environment. You'll both need to be able to handle that situation in a mature manner if it ever crops up.

Fingers crossed ?

1

I wouldn't do that. Workplace romance can have very bad results.
However the heart knows what the heart knows so if you do head that direction keep in mind that the workplace may be a little difficult should things end. It could do more damage than an awkward situation

Good luck

Thanks for your input. Basically I'm a marriage only person to start with and he's aware of it... so if things start then there should be a happy ending only hopefully ?

1

I had a crush on a boss some years back. I knew I would be there a certain amount of time, so I kept quiet about it until I left. After that I did tell him. Never heard back.

? sorry for that but at least you tried...?
I don't think that I'd ever be as brave to do it.

2

It is never a good idea to date your boss, or a person you supervise. If you are in another department and he doesn't control or heavily influence your evaluation or compensation, it might be OK. But only might.

2

Find somebody outside work!! Unless you hate your job and want a new one of t hose, as well.

I'm moving to a different department. All the feelings are in my heart only, nothing else has been done.

@Dreamer777 also, there is most definitely a "rebound" period and it is around a year, not 2 months.......

@AnneWimsey one year ? that's a lot of time.
Well he had complained to me about his issues with her even a couple of months earlier... before the actual break-up happened

1

Theres always hope. Just play it right so you don't get hurt. Not having someone you feel deeply for is something most people experience at some time. Good luck.

Nardi Level 7 June 29, 2018

Thanks for your insights, much appreciated

4

Its a long time till the office party but I would wait till you move jobs. Even if he fancies you it would be a no-no to date someone directly under him.

Thanks for the advice, it really makes sense. ??

@Dreamer777 Maybe make some excuse to come back and visit. Then pull him aside and ask what he thinks of dating within the company employees? Sort of "would it be ok if you didnt work together? (if yes) What are you doing this weekend?"

@273kelvin hmmm sounds like a good plan.. would need a lot of courage though ?

@Dreamer777 I am a little older than yourself and I do not wish to come over as too wise but know this. We regret the things that we do not do in life much more than the things we do.

@273kelvin I highly appreciate you sharing your wisdom .. it's kind of you and it's true. I might be younger but have already seen a lot in life and regret not doing a lot so I can relate but this one is hard that it took me once 6 months to recover...?

@273kelvin Safest way would probably to spy away through a common friend... to at least get some hints on how would things turn should I consider starting any move!

@273kelvin that was a very nice bit of advice you shared. You've got a warm way with words. OMG that could be construed as a temperature joke!

@Dreamer777 Sounding it out seems like a good idea.

4

Danger, Will Robinson. Definitely wait till you're Iin different departments, and give him some time to clear his last relationship. You don't want to be the short term rebound relationship, right?

1

There might be hope after you move to another department. Right now your boss is probably barred by company policy from acting on any feelings he might have. The CEO of Intel just lost his job for doing that.

This is true, the organization is putting more strict rules about it. This makes me understand why sometimes he's extra cold when we're around other people in a meeting for instance...
Hoping to move fast.
Thank you so much for the insight

2

If your moving to a different department will he still be your boss? Will you see him often still at work if your in a different department? Im only asking bewif he doesn't feel the same way you don't have to have awkward run-ins and if the relationship doesn't work out he can't make your life hell at work because he is no longer your boss. Also is the place you work a full of people who gossip and tell your business?

No, he will not be my boss but we'll still be in the same entity and he'll be working more with my new boss. It's true that people talk but it's a huge organization that it's normal that colleagues become couples.
I hope that it ends up well ❤

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