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How do you view casual see. Do you believe in monogamy. I think we are all very sexual and sensual creatures. Can we truly be tied down to one person?

My_Best_Side 3 June 29

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I do believe that it's possible to be faithful to one person over a lifespan, for positive and/or negative reasons. I believe as well that some of us aren't wired to have intimate relationships that last a long time. Also, I believe that some of us aren't equipped to form close bonds, either due to trauma, self-absorption, immaturity, or our basic wiring. I don't ascribe to the bromide that there's someone for everyone in a perfect 1-1 correlation. However, I do think that the spectrum of human relational needs and personalities is a broad and diverse one, and probability--not fate--says that eventually most of us will find someone who falls within a range of enough desirable attributes to connect on an intimate level. It's just that nothing is guaranteed. That's part of what makes this thing called love so risky, and (Sigh!) frustrating, and delightful if/when it finally happens. And although I don't believe in finding "the right one," I still have hope in finding someone with whom I'm compatible at some point, and resolve to live my life as fully as possible regardless of my relationship status. Sometimes it's just wiser to believe things will work out--I've found I can get more accomplished that way. (Individual results may vary.)


Men who want casual sex with no commitment are a dime a dozen.

The majority of women, including me, are hoping for a loving, committed relationship.

This age-old tension creates dating misunderstandings, dashed hopes and heartbreak.

"Why do you ladies want it all?" Jack Nicholson asked Diane Keaton in "A Good As It Gets." "I don't know, we're just silly that way," she replied.

After being married for 36 years and loosing my wife, I'm not sure i could do casual. I need security and depth to that kind if relationship


I think the Garden of Eden story brought the focus on the two adults but I think it's more about the children. They seem to thrive on the sense of security of having the same two people in the home all the time. Not just that but they expect things to stay that way. My guess is that generally adults need more than one partner in life to be fulfilled and their children need them not to live that way. Whose needs matter more?


I think monogamy is great, but not for everyone. I've tried the casual connections, and they can be fun with the right person, but ultimately not for me. It feels empty to me. I like the security and connection of being with just one person.

Right on.


I think physical attraction has to be present first and foremost in any sexual relationship it just isn’t going to happen otherwise. Are we programmed to only be attracted to one person? Well that patently can’t be true or most of us would never find our one match. It is largely serendipity meeting up with a compatible mate. I myself would never have met my husband had he not moved to Edinburgh from Belfast. I had plenty of boyfriends before I met him but the chemistry wasn’t really there, but Bingo! when I met Peter I knew instantly we were made for each other. Sadly he died in 2010 after 37 years together and since then I have never felt that chemistry again. I don’t know if I will ever find another partner, but unless that same chemical reaction is there it won’t. So yes, some if us can be completely contented with our one mate, but like everything in life its not the same for everyone.


I have always wondered this myself but then I met a girl and we got married and I never even thought about sex with anyone else. I had my answer because I think what I had is probably exactly what I wanted.
Now post-divorce I will have casual sex but not exactly by design. It just may work out that way occasionally on my way to that next great relationship. I am pretty sure I want that more than a string of kinda good relationships.
I think with the right people/connection any sort of arrangement is possible. I don't feel like monogamy is the "right" answer for everyone but I probably lean more towards monogamy because I have never really been a wandering type in relationships of any significance.
I definitely do not have a problem with casual sex or friends with benefits or those types of less committed arrangements but they are not the end goal for me


Everyone is different. I've dabbled in the casual route, haven't found much fulfillment in it. But if I'm with someone I have a deep trust and connection with, I don't need to look elsewhere.


i use to believe that it was one person and total monogamousness but others didnt have the same notion and now i feel just the opposite i can be in love with someone and share him no biggie


These are two different issues. Yes, people are sexual and sensual, and, they can express it in many ways. Monogamous couples with matching sex drive may have more sex than people who have to go looking for it.

UUNJ Level 8 June 29, 2018

My personality is monogamous to the core. I can’t force it to not be.


Hmm... belief wise I am pretty convinced monogamy is more socially ingrained than a genetic disposition. More people seem to cheat than not even though they think it wrong. So what does that say?

For me personally, I'm just too overly sensitive to medications to risk the chance of STDs. My life and already limited health is far more important to me than chancing the risks. And I think that is a personal choice that should be communicated clearly and regularly to whom ever anyone makes the decision to have sex with.

I do have to say I don't think forever is a healthy thing. I don't think one person for life is healthy. One or the other could die, or cheat, and then what? Just be celibate for the rest of life? No... When my marriage is done, be it a run of course or his death, I'd be open to eventually move on again.

AmyLF Level 7 June 29, 2018

I don't stay sexually monogamous neither does my wife. Why should we went yourself just because of anachronistic cultural mores?


If men mention on this website that they are into casual sex or polyamory I go ahead and block them as I don't want to consider them for dating.

I want a steady companion for dancing and hiking, and don't care about the sex part so much.
Otherwise, I prefer being single.

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The website uses profile algorithms to find member matches, so the more details one includes, the better the match.

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I enjoy committed see. Eyes are so very personal, you know.

Deveno Level 7 June 29, 2018

I find myself having far nicer and healthier relationships poly than I ever did monogamous.


Casual see is the shii


I'm an introvert, I have to be monogamous, saves me from meeting other


If I'm with the one who is the one , why should I waste my time , effort , and a great relationship to sample second best ?


We all try but it doesn't seem to be working ? I for one could never be in a monogamous relationship forever !

Could you do it for two?

Nope, I talk only of myself, others must sort themselves out !

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