Agnostic.com

7 4

Pretty powerful essay.

"A more interesting question, a question that perhaps you’ve never considered before, is what pain do you want in your life? What are you willing to struggle for? Because that seems to be a greater determinant of how our lives turn out."

[qz.com]

ProudMary 8 July 8
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

7 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

0

Jeezus, there is a choice involved with pain? Since when?

0

Since age 21, I have hiked over 200 miles/year. Hiking is my passion. In 2017, I set a personal record by hiking 326 miles with over 63,200 feet of elevation gain.

Couldn't have done it without weightlifting, running and stretching. While backpacking, at 115 lbs I carry a 40-lb. pack.

Weightlifting and aerobic exercise develop endurance and muscle strength, so we can do the things we love.

Stretching after exercise helps prevent muscle pain and develops flexibility and balance. After a workout, stretching is my favorite part.

Of course I have dealt with painful injuries, and major shoulder surgery in 2009. That didn't stop me. I figure scars are badges of an athletic life.

Each time, I leaned how to prevent the same injury in the future. Healed with RICE: rest, ice, compression and elevation. And stretching.

My hero is Galen, father of one of my friends. He and I lift weights at the same place. To celebrate his 94th birthday, Galen backpacked down to the bottom of the Grand Canyon and back up. He took four days, instead of the usual two days.

Photos: Beautiful Spider Meadows, WA, 2012; Weightlifting at the YMCA, 2014; Starfish abdominal exercise, 2016.

0

I don't know why anyone would desire pain in their life, and I guess to understand the writer's message, I'd have to interpret that to mean what pain am I willing to endure?

I have been extremely fortunate in my life to have never had any chronic diseases, or somatic pain that has left me debilitated in any way. At 68, I still feel quite physically fit; I rarely get sick with colds or flu, vision is fairly good still, and I have pretty good reflexes, recall, and clarity of mind.

The one area that has eluded me, in a broad sense, is sustained intimate relationships; and it seems, perhaps, I just may not be built for that. I've had marriages of 14 and 12 years duration, respectively, and cohabitated with another for 5 years. But, now I'm once again on a singular path. It's lonely; however, it seems that it's the optimum way for me to live.

So, I get the basic message the writer is trying to convey, I think; and that, to me, is whatever path in life you find yourself on, don't grouse and rue your course, you put yourself there by the choices you made. I understand there are things in life beyond our control, that chronic, congenital diseases and physiological malignancies are nothing anyone would choose for themselves, and I cannot speak to the courage it takes to struggle daily through those. But I speak of acceptance of circumstances as they are and how we deal with what we believe is our fate in life. That is what I take away from this essay.

There are rare times I think, "How did I end up like this; pretty much alone and with an almost non-existent social network"? Only a very few short years ago, I was in a relationship, had many friends, went to parties, and seemed to be enjoying a very fulfilling life.

Well, the relationship went south, I left not only the person, but also the aforementioned 'fulfilling life.' So, it seems things can reverse very quickly; turn on a dime, if you will.

On the other hand, the flip side, I answer to no one but myself, and I do whatever I want, within my means, of course. That's the trade-off, I suppose. No one tells me what to do, because there's no one here to do so.

BTW, the article following the one in this post is also quite interesting; about losing our heroes.

@ProudMary thanks, I have a lot of time to "think about these things." ?

0

The pain of friendships lost. least they started.

1

I struggle to maintain my freedom and integrity in a world that seems designed to strip me of these most prized assets. It's a constant struggle but one that I feel is worth every tear drop, every bead of sweat from struggle and every heartbreak for the losses and setbacks that inevitably occur and the people who cave into the constant pressure to concede and are lost along the way.

0

I don't want any pain in my life, but if I HAD to chose one it would have to be to lose my parents, because that is the only painful thing you cannot avoid in life. The second question is what am I willing to struggle for... well I struggle for happiness for me and the people I love.

1

You have to be willing to do the work. Dan and I talk about this all the time. We are avoiding land mines by talking things out now. We both have plenty of baggage which needs to be dealt with and discarded so we can have a happy healthy relationship.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:125401
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.