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I've had one of those rare moments of epiphany. When life gets really annoying I tend to berate God, asking if this is more of Thou's sense of humor, and a niece asked me why I do that if I don't believe in God? I mumbled something about not being literal in my ranting but needing something to blame. That question has stayed with me, however, and I've finally truly answered it.
It's really anger toward my parents for dying (dad) or ignoring my needs (mom) that I'm connecting to. Death is God's realm so denying Thou's existence gives me power over this Deity. While I intellectually see no reason for belief I have maintained a refusal to give up my childish demand for power over The Deity.
Maybe now I can do that and move on but I doubt it. I'm human, after all, and we don't really stop believing in nonsense.

rainmanjr 7 Jan 9

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I knew this Italian pizza maker was always talking about Santa well people could not quite understand Santa they miss took that he was saying Satan. I asked him why everyone said he was a Satan worshiper said he did not get it either explained he felt like Santa bringing joy to all his patrons. He opened a drawer full to the brim with different religious pamphlets, said I have never even been to a church. He was agnostic he just liked Santa.

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I have seen life through the eyes of kings, and wept the tears of a thousand years. Who shall stand with me--sword and shield in hand--to taunt the shepherds beyond the walls? We are all bound by valor and blood. We are all brothers in the hunt. Push the gods aside, and tear down the battlements.

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We are only human. You can show anger towards anything.

Very true. Maybe I'll shake my fist at the moon, instead. 🙂

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