His ears were enormous. I couldn't not look.

He drove a Chevy.

Saying, " I'm a social drinker" and then proceeding to get completely shit faced immediately.

Three years ago, a man I dated turned out to be a criminal, thief and a liar. Stephen scammed 17 friends and investors out of over $694,000 of their life savings, depositing their funds into his personal account. He was arrested and charged, stripped of his broker’s license by the state, fined $50,000 and forced to pay restitution.

He pleaded guilty. I am surprised he did not do jail time.

How did I find out? After four weeks of dating, I received a text from an unnamed stranger. This person alerted me to Stephen’s court record, and said Stephen has another girlfriend.

The only way that person could have known my name and phone number- and the fact I was dating Stephen- is through Stephen’s phone. Of course Stephen denied it.

This reminded me to look up the names of men I meet.

Because we only dated for four weeks, I wasn't emotionally invested. Stephen said he loves me. "Too much, too fast," I replied.

In retrospect, occasionally Stephen lapsed into moaning: “I used to be powerful, rich and respected! Hundreds of people listened to me! Now I am a landscape contractor.”

When I asked why he changed jobs, he did not answer. This was disconcerting. Nobody enjoys being around a moaner and complainer.

When I told Stephen we were through, he had an emotional meltdown, crying and sobbing for an hour. I calmly handed Stephen a box of tissues and took out my mending.

“How can you be so calm?” he asked, distraught. “One of us has to be the adult here,” I replied. When he stopped crying I told him to leave.

"I'm going to win you back," Stephen said. "I cannot trust you," I replied. "We are not a couple. You are a master manipulator, a liar and a thief. I want nothing to do with you ever again.”

Talking to his phone Siri during dinner.

When she tried to bring me to Jesus because she believed we were in the "final days." That was in 1991. My vetting skills have improved considerably since then.

Liking dogs more than cats and thinking pinot grigio is better than pinot noir. We clearly were not compatible.

Saying "conversate" instead of "converse". I can't Deal with it.

I keep reading legitimate reasons not to date someone. C'm'on people, don't go deep; keep it shallow.

A scarf, it did not match and she didn't know how to wear it.

Her voice was really annoying...we probably should have talked more

Unladylike act of trying to throw litter on the road from my truck.

A guy talking about his Maserati like it was his girlfriend. Way too creepy.

Her laugh ?

He was too clingy too early in the relationship

Height. Must be at least 5'9" to ride.

Small penis.

I dated a woman who just wasn't very bright. We went to an Indian restaurant once and she asked what was in a particular dish. When the waiter included peas among the ingredients, she asked how they were cooked. My inner voice was screaming, "So they're hot all the way through!"

Jacked up teeth. Poor guy needed braces and a major scraping.

She was a smoker. Kissing an ashtray, blech ?

Didn't know who the group Blondie was. When I was getting to know him, he claimed he listened to music, however when I actually met him he said he didn't.

Thought science/evolution was boring. I'm from a science family, and to be told that was unacceptable. He claimed he was an atheist so I assumed his interest in science was at least minimal. Not only did he have no interest, he ridiculed my interest.

All he wanted to talk about was his Vespa. I don't mind bikes, but I have more than one interest.

Most shallow reason for a breakup? My girlfriend couldn't swim in the deep...

I'm still friends to this day with this wonderful person, thanks to the internet. However we stopped dating because at my senior prom ( her Junior year ) she had a very specific vision of what I would wear to prom. I told her if we were still dating the next year, I'd wear whatever she wanted me to. But that didn't satisfy her. I eventually told her that I would be taking someone else to prom and we could talk about it later if she wanted. It was only a few days before. I really felt like a jerk for quite a while after, over breaking up over an outfit, but I just wanted to be myself. I did wear a tux jacket. And a Hawaiian shirt. And Dickey's pants.

She had a couple hairs on top of her big toe.