You can't save everyone. In fact you can't save anyone they have to save themselves.

"Studying" myself so that, in knowing myself better, I can change what needs to be changed in order to live a fuller, richer life.

You sound a lot like me...

As I've grown older and hopefully wiser,I cannot help but rerun mistakes and casual cruelties I feel I committed when younger. I won't say they haunt me, but they are constant reminders that where we come from always stays with us.

Low self-efficacy

Feeling like I say stupid shit to people, and don't realize it. Be it me thinking I'm a comedian, or whatever... sometimes shit that rubs people the wrong way just comes out, and I really never intend to be a craphead. That, as well as feeling like an outsider, and never finding a social niche, which may totally be tied into that...I'll never really know. I'd say, just like you, "much of it could be resolved with real unconditional love," which so few actually get...especially in the younger years. And the most predominant feeling I'd claim, since 4 yrs old, is "alone."

My family moved at least 16 times by the time I started high school (and 10 more after that!), and it has given me a constant need for control over my own life. Never drink, smoke, tried drugs, or done anything that I think is out of my control... Although I don’t try to control other people or relationships, it does get in the way of relaxing and enjoying myself fully when I’m with someone. ?

I’ve never been enough (good, smart, pretty, popular, etc. enough).

Being afraid of people depending on me only to have me fail to provide what they depend on. This can really limit my ability to step outside myself sometimes.

Like some other commentators here, feeling like I've not lived up to my potential. I get too easily sidetracked, a mile wide and an inch deep. Jack of all trades, master of none--that kind of thing. OTOH, I'm pretty versatile and curious, so I have that going for me, which is nice. My more positive subtext is that I have always taken great delight in learning more about the natural world and all the critters in it (with the exception of the big damn bathroom spider that always seems to be lurking for me at 4:30 am on work mornings--that critter I can take a pass on).

Being misunderstood, ostracized, and resented.

Sorry, not sorry I'm so slender, smart, and unconcerned with the status quo. GFY.

Being the daughter of an absent, albeit religiously zealous, alcoholic father.

My frustrating search for lasting love & my feeling inadequate, even unlovable, without at least a working model of it. Yes, I had a long relationship that worked but not permanently--the upside is that we've remained friends. Yes, I'm working on loving and taking care of myself after misdirecting my focus for so long. But my years of loneliness & unplanned solitude still haunt me--in effect, that's my Kryptonite.

I grew up in a very small Catholic town, where days became months, and months became years. Fear of change, and of the outside world, is common in such environments. In my early 20's I vowed to not be afraid of the world. I made a point of breaking the rule. I also was raised with a lack of unconditional love. I see now that my mom's life revolved around that fear, and she was trying to instill it in me, to protect me. That realization makes it much easier for me to move on, and focus on how to break the cycle.

Though I wouldn’t follow through, the desire to end my life started at 11. I don’t have many memories before that.
I don’t think love will resolve your issue. I think it has to be repaired from within.

Wow I am so sorry that you have this. My family was odd and back when I was a kid I always felt I needed to make up stories about my family in order to appear more normal. Am I beyond that? Yeah I think so but sometimes I wonder