What do older women think about dating younger men?
I lived with a man for a couple of years who was 24 years my junior. He was wonderful and I love him, still. But I decided to end it for several reasons. First, our basic priorities were different. Stability and security were important to me, so it really bothered me when he would quit a job without notice and sometimes without telling me, even pretending to go to work in the morning because he didn't want to tell me he quit. Childish in my opinion. At least find another job before you give up on one. Second, he let his little dog pee all over the house. If he would just have had the dog fixed, it might have stopped, but he wouldn't hear of it. It was a male dog. Third, my health issues. I have had heart trouble to varying degrees since I was 16. Bigger issues as I get older. I believe it would be unfair to ask him to stick with me as I got older and more likely, sicker. Just seemed like too big a sacrifice. He was willing and fought hard for me, but it didn't feel fair and I was afraid he would be sorry somewhere down the road. Seemed to me he should be able to hike and camp and be active in ways I couldn't, that he should find someone who he could be with and maybe have a family. He said it didn't matter but I couldn't steal his youth like that.
Having said that, I do think there's such a thing as too much of an age difference. At some point you don't have the same sociocultural experiences and it can be weird when you make a reference to something or someone (such as Gilda Radner) and the response is a blank look. I do find that I generally have a closer attitudinal match with men a decade or so younger. I seems there are more male feminists in that age cohort.
To some extent, I agree with JustLynnie ~ too many men in their early-mid 50s look and act "old". But of course it's as individual as people are, and I prefer to get to know someone based on mutual interests and similar attitudes. I also prefer hard rock over smooth jazz, and use my AARP discount for tickets to the latest Vin Diesel movie, not the early-bird special at Applebee's... I agree with MsDemeanour as well, I refuse to be hairless from the nape down; also since guys younger than 40 or so have grown up with internet porn basically their entire lives and think THIS 'Mrs Robinson' has a cornucopia of kink (sorry, I don't).. I would question a 30-yr old man's motives if he wants to be with someone my age!
My first husband was 3 years older than me, my second was 11 years younger. Guess who was more mature? He also was much more of a father to my children than their biological father.
I date about 10 years on either side side of my age(47). Any more than that and there’s a disconnect with life experience, understanding where my priorities are at home and work.
Anything more than 5-6 yrs makes me feel disconnected . I have heard the " age is just a number ", and I have no idea what that means in reality . I prefer been intimate brain and body ways w someone that grew up at same times w me . I don't want to have to explain the 80s .. another thing that bothers me , and I have to decline often and explain , young men on their 30s.. I am two years away from 50. They ask me out or try to flirt at work and other places , and I have to say as polite as possible , " u know I am probably same age as your mother right ?". The fact that I don't look like does not change the reality . A bright young doc doing his residency this year asked me out recently at work . Although I have stoped explain in depth anymore my position on age difference , I took the time and told him this , and gladly telling u all at this post as well today :" the women on their fifties will be here for u when u are 50. They ain't go anywhere . Date someone your age , your generation for now , live on your time and era . ".
In my experience , the younger men I've met , tend to deal with an older woman better than a man with a younger woman . FIrst , they're looking for more intelligence , and don't feel threatened that a woman may know some things they haven't learned , yet . And we're not just talking sex here . They tend to make this decision early on . My first younger man , was a recent graduate of the Air Force Academy . While we were dating , he completed his Masters in engineering . He was telling me about a friend he admired , who , he discovered had recently joined Mensa . Water seeks it's own level . I told him he would easily qualify . He later took the tests and was admitted as well . The first time I went to his place , he was in BQ and had brought in eight bookcases , and stacked them against the end wall of his quarters . They were filled with books . Upon close inspection , I was surprised at the vast majority I had already read .
What do you consider older/younger? I am all for it. Usually do better with somebody about 10 years younger personally and voted as such.
Well I can only tell you what "older" women have told me when they get messages from younger guys. "Creepy" is a commonly used word. I try to tell them that at least it's flattering and they don't think so. I went out with a women 15 years younger and it was great because she was brilliant and we hit it off, she also approached me first. Still friends 19 years later.
I agree with that, when I get messages from guys in their 20’s. I think of boys with mommy issues or wanting to play out a MILF fantasy a la “American Pie”
Neither of those. It's the bloody maintenance required that puts me off dating a younger man. Ya gotta put in too much effort, make up, shaving, hairdresser.
Does that mean that you don't do that when you date guys your ago or older....or you just don't bother with dating? I don't like high maintenance princesses, but I don't want to date a guy either!!!
@jondspen I do like to dress up on occassion. But I live in a hot climate. Few women wear makeup daily.....it drips off the face. I refuse to shave my wotsit cos it itches when it grows back ( please don't tell me remedies. I don't want to look llike a pre-pubescent anyway). I have a fullfilling and fun life and don't feel any burning need for a partner in any case. so I guess the point is moot.