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Jesus knocked on my door last night. just as I was settling in to watch nova, I get a knock on the door. two guys from a local church stopping by to welcome me to the neighborhood (I've been here over a year). "boy, are you knocking on the wrong door", I said. normally, I'd just wish them best of luck and send them on their way, but I was feeling a bit salty and decided to engage them. what follows is a few of the highlights:

me: do you interpret the bible literally or metaphorically?
them: literally.
me: so....jonah and the whale, for example, literal?
them: yes.
me: so...a human being lived inside an ocean going mammal, whose insides contain no oxygen and toxic methane?
them: nods.

me: adam & eve.....cain & abel....and seth don't forget seth. first time he's mentioned in the bible it's only by name. the second time he's mentioned, his wife is also referenced. if there was nobody else around, whom did he marry??
him:............his mother?

and my favorite:

me: do you believe the story of noah's ark?
them: yes.
me: everything on earth wiped out except the ark?
them: yes.
me: then how do you explain the fact that there is written evidence that proves that numerous cultures & peoples existed during the time of the supposed flood?
them: shrug

at that point, I'd had enough and decided it was time to wish them a good night and kick them to the curb.

it was worth missing nova, I'll catch it in reruns.

pilgrim 4 Jan 26
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13 comments

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0

You have far more patience than I do.

0

Reminds me of the time a young mother with her teen age son, showed at my door with her pamblett and inviting me to her church. I just calmly declared that I was not interested, and the look on her face was of disbelief...'your not interested, are you serious?' I had to tell her...'yes, I am serous, I AM not interested'. They never came back!

1

I tell them they can come in & talk, but I warn them up-front that I am an atheist that has read the bible. That usually has them saying that they will come back at a later time (which they never do!).

2

I always enjoy the logical argument, either God's faulty workmanship (he made man then he's unhappy with how man behaved, they usually come back with either freewill or Satan, Satan is easy because according to their divine source of knowledge God made Satan so we are still stuck with faulty workmanship, free will is a bit harder but since God supposedly has freewill and is supposed to be perfect that doesn't fly as excuse.) or if we are going the God created everything route who created God always flusters them (Of course they come back with he was always there so they I come back with why can't the universe have always been there, the next round is but the universe is so complex and then they run away when I wonder "And your creator isn't" ).
Sometimes I can be very mean.

Kimba Level 7 Jan 26, 2018
3

I am a us marine. And some of the people I’ve met in service are terrifying.
Me and this kid had latched on to each other in boot camp. We just matched and got through the bs of the suck together. Never talked about religion or science.
One day we are hanging out during the 1 hour before lights out we’d get to straighten our gear out and write letters home. We and a friend were talking and it led to evolution. And nonchalantly thinking everyone learned this in class like I did. I said oh absolutely. I love the fact that over the years the changes in creatures can be so vast that one day my grandchildren could be different because of something I went through.
Then boom. He blew the fuck up screaming about god and Noah and the creation of life through 7 days. He got violent and I had to take him down. Which got us fucked up for days. And ended our relationship. They are violent animals. And the only way to fight them is by being smarter. More resilient. Changing things where they actually matter. Not face to face because they are too loud to talk over. To violent and close minded to change.

@Ryan86 -- I hear you, bro. Been there, done that, and it can get unpleasant.

He showed some of that famous Christian love.

They must challenge, as... it is like THEY need to protect GOD! They seem to think we insult God, and they need to defend him! If they believed in the God, of their Bible...he is everywhere, all the time and forever...that God surely needs no help! The people that I have experience with, have made a God, in man's image! No wonder they are fearful!

1

I guess it's a good feeling to challenge the ignorant with the stupidity of the bible... I haven't had the chance yet. I did get my son thinking a bit... he has to tip toe on this because the in laws are real hard core Catholic. I tip toe around my wife... she's got enough problems then crying every night for my sole.... don't want to put her there. I don't want to break her spirit. I'm still a secret that hasn't been discovered by everyone.

3

he was also yammering on about christianity being the one true religion. i told him every religion says that. and to every point he tried to make i replied with my standard reply to anyone trying to convince me their god is the real deal: that's what every religion says.

over 5000 different gods are worshiped by humans, billions of galaxies each containing billions of stars and planets, and god created all that just to have a personal relationship with me? yeah, get off my porch.

0

Good on ya!

I've never dived into one of those discussion...yet.

1

I'm sure you had fun, but of course it probably did no good. I sometimes use the Bible to mess with religious nuts who attack me online, both to amuse myself, and for others who read my comments, but I've never seen it make one iota of difference to the religious nuts.

3

I had a pamphlet left off at my door from the 7th Day Adventists. I took their paper and a copy of the Freedom From Religion Foundation newsletter to their meeting hall and left them with a note: "you shared your information with me now I am returning the favor". Not heard back from them.

Another, funny incident years ago in Germany. Some Jehova's Witnesses came to my door with their pamphlets. I told them I couldn't speak German but they (2 older women) said they would return. I was out but they saw a stairway leading to my upstairs neighbor (a big, burly, harry American who had just gotten out of the shower). They knocked on his door and he wrapped a towel around himself and answered. He told me the women were surprised but they were on a mission and explained that they wanted to leave some material for his downstairs neighbor. He knew what was going on and took his hand off of the towel to reach for the pamphlets. He said he was afraid they would hurt themselves they were going down the stairs so fast!

1

Ah faith ... ain't it grand ? Love truly is blinder than blind.

I would love to have been a fly on the doorbell for this show ! Thanks for sharing !

PS - you can see your missed Nova on PBS.org !

2

I've engaged with the thumpers similarly, but prefer now to not miss the Nova segment.

1

Sometimes I get a kick out of messing with them too.

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