Im curious to know how many people believe that after the age of 60-65 or even older that they are going t find someone who make them have butterflies in their stomach like they may have had when they were in their teens and twenties?
I really don’t think age matters. You may be more pick due to experience but that can be a good thing.
Cathexis is possible at any age, although on average it tends to have less of a hold on the older and more experienced of us, and it's less the goal than a pleasant experience along the way. Cathexis, "falling in love" or whatever you want to call it, is not a sustainable state of affairs. We are not configured to forever sustain emotional highs (or lows). That's what's called hedonic tone.
That's not to say that one can't pair bond very strongly and experience intimacy, it's just to say that it's not all about floating on flowery beds of ease forever after. Success is not defined in terms of "constant emotional highs". It is loyalty, devotion, consistency, and integrity expressed over time and through / despite difficulties and disappointments.
I suppose it is possible for some people, however, I think most people at that age are thinking about companionship and finding a person who they can share their life experiences with, rather than thinking about sex or butterflies. The butterflies in the stomach thing was never something I experienced. I am 4 months out from losing my husband and am finding that some of my friends are wanting to introduce me to "someone nice". I am not interested in finding another partner right now. I enjoy meeting new people, and perhaps in time I might meet someone I want to go farther than just friendship with, but right now I am learning how to be on my own again.
I doubt very seriously that it's going to happen for me. Also, I'm still in love with my ex-wife.
I think it's still possible. I don't think things change that much.