A Bitter Slap for my Wrinkled Ass

Due to the vulgarities and vagaries of life, I recently hosted a party for a herd of middle school kids. Initially, i was excited; their chosen theme was "Rock and Roll". Posters of AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, and Queen were festooned about the room. There was professional lighting and a DJ. Surely, this night would not suck...
Flash forward to the harshest of ass slaps: the realization that i am OLD.
I can now and forevermore use the phrase "kids these days". Such as, kids these days have the shittiest music.
The posters boasted REAL music, GOOD music, not this horror of noise and nonsense. I'm so old, not only did I not know a single song the entire night, nor could I understand the lyrics.
Each hour, the kids grew happier and were near to bursting with shared joy. meanwhile, I could feel my very life tick, tick, ticking away...
I am but a husk of a woman, withering away, as the newer generation heralds in the next era. I am but yesterday's news, good for little more than fish wrapping.
but by these warped and wrinkled hands... I shall not go down quietly! NO! For I have the good shit. Metallica! Nirvana! Red Hot Chili Peppers!

...Damn kids these days...