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I was attending a family shindig / dinner gathering when one of my family members had the bright idea to ask me to say grace. I sighed heavily and nodded. I believe I started with something like, "Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today to witness the union of this food with our bodies..."

Anyway, I think my family finally figured out that I don't share in their beliefs.

#beliefs #grace
Switchboard 4 Dec 10
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8 comments

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0

Level 7

Thank you turkey, for growing healthy and strong, then being our dinner...itadakemasu!!

3

Level 8

Dear beloved..... Ha ha ... Prince came to mind

@Charity ahhhhh....I should scroll down more often ???? oh well, the more the merrier ????

@Charity by the way, my day is going great !!!!! Someone called me sugar !!! Yay !!!!! ( Bright eyes bushy tail ?????? )..... that's how I say thanks ??

@Charity I know, no harm done by any means. You really made my day ????

@Charity well you got me walking on clouds today !! ???????
2

Level 9

"Grace! She was the bitch that married my brother. I thought we were never to speak of her again after the divorce."

1

Level 8

I’m an ordained minister and an atheist, and have found plenty of ways to say and do things that most people assume HAVE to be religious in a humanistic/non-theistic way.

2

Level 7

Father, son, holy ghost whoever eats the fastest gets the most.

3

Level 8

Here’s the potatoes, here’s the meat, goddamn it, let’s eat

2

Level 8

That's funny. Instead of someone delivering a prayer the host would lead us in singing the national anthem at family Christmas parties.

@AlPastor Actually I would do bohemian rhapsody or tradition from fiddler on the roof just because.

2

Level 9

I'd have just said "GRACE!!!" and started eating.

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