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Who has nice revenge stories?

noblepeasant 3 Mar 13
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When my daughter was an adolescent and teenager, she refused to talk with me about body changes, birth control or sex. So, I put pamphlets on Claire's bed since she is a reader.

In high school, Claire did Running Start. At 18, she graduated with a high school diploma and a two-year college Associate degree. That meant at 18, she started as a college junior.

An only child and a gifted negotiator, Claire convinced college administrators to let her skip the dorm and live in an on-campus apartment instead. For her first apartment, her dad and I gathered things she needed, right down to toilet paper.

In my living room, I filled paper shopping bags with items for Claire. For 10 years, I was a board member for Family Planning (now Planned Parenthood). Grinning, I went to Family Planning and quietly got 100 free condoms.

Separating the condom strips, I sprinkled condoms evenly in the shopping bags. Shook them to the bottom. For once in my life, I shut up.

To set up Claire's first apartment, Claire brought a sheltered girlfriend who wasn't going to college.

Claire called her father, appalled. "Dad! Do you know what Mom did? Mom put condoms in my bags!"

To his credit, Terry laughed and said mildly, "You know your mother."

When Claire would speak to me a week later, I explained. "Claire, I am not telling you to have sex with 100 boys. I want you to protect yourself from STDs and pregnancy. How long have I been telling you that you will not be a teen parent?"

"Since birth," Claire said ruefully.

"I tell all of my friends this story," Claire, 28, said recently. "I think it's hilarious! They do, too."

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We had a boss who was useless, he was supposed to be foreman of big yard of pipes and fittings for natural gas production. He wouldn't even come out into the area he was supervising because he didn't like getting dirty. We spent a couple of weeks moving inventory from it's designated area to random spots, we knew where everything was and continued to fulfill orders but the filing system charts had become completely wrong and useless. We all quit without notice, the whole place had to shut down because even after they found new forklift drivers EVERY time he told them where something was, he was wrong. He was fired after a couple of days. Bonus facts, since no management ever came into our area we brought whole kegs of beer to work. The top guy, his superior was named Royal Bliss.

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I am a revenge story!

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