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New Member here. I know this subject is probably brought up all the time, but here goes. How did/do you go about "Coming out" to family and friends. Example: My wife is still a die-hard believer, and I am not. How do I approach it with her?

JayCruiser67 2 Mar 9
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12 comments

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I have never understood why religious beliefs need broadcasting! IIMO that is what is wrong with our country today. Everybody please STFU about your ideas unless directly asked!

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I think that you know her better than any of us and her possible reaction, by telling her you will to some extent be challenging her belief and some people react very badly to their belief system being thrown into doubt, that said if you don't say anything you will be hurting yourself with a lie.
I suppose you could try and do it gently ie I'm not quite sure about this God thing any more.
The main thing is it's not a crime to not believe, it's not like you're going to tell her you're a serial killer and the bodies are buried in the yard.
Good luck

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A good question with a variety of possible outcomes. This is a common question that I have watched on great programs (youtube) such as "The Athiest Expereince" and "The thinking Athiest." There are many podcasts and shows that address this scenerio. I would spend some time and listen to them. In the end, you are the one who is best suited to make the choice. This is just an small sample of the many shows about or that include that topic. Good luck.

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My dad saw that I had changed my religious views on Facebook to "atheist". He was angry and said that he didn't want me embarrassing him (he's a pastor). I straight up told my mother because I really don't like hiding things from people. She flipped out and my reaction was a bit less controlled than it was with my father. I ended up accusing her of emotional abuse (which was true, but not an accusation I intended on making in that instance), and she didn't talk to me for almost a month. My sisters were perfectly fine with it, one of them being a none herself.

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Wow, how you come out to your wife about being an atheist is a hard question. You know your wife, but it sure is something I'd want to get out there. It would be harder for me to live with a believer who didn't know how I reallly feel.

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Just be yourself...be honest.

Nena Level 6 Mar 10, 2018
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The distancing between me and the church has been fairly gradual. I think most people who know me have a pretty good idea that I'm not a believer, but they don't ask. Why should they? It's none of their business, and they know that. I don't know how many of them are believers, either. I'm not even sure about my wife, who hasn't been to church or spoken to a priest for a great many years but still writes 'Anglican' on hospital admission forms and the like.

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I mainly wanted to welcome you here...your concern is not something that I have experienced, even with friends. Now, over time one partner grew into a different belief, but no one sprung it on their partner, suddenly! You know your wife better than anyone, so I think that you will need to start informing her in increments...or just sit down with her and explain, how you feel and what you believe. Hopefully, you can reassure her, that she is free to believe what she wants to, regardless.

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Nice dress, honey. I'm an atheist.

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It could destroy your relationship. Can your wife accept you as you are. Can you go on with your life as it is now and not tell her. Those are things that you have to consider. I never told my mother that I was an atheist from the time that I was eight years old, and I just never discussed religion with her. However this is different than living with your wife. I did not live with my mother as an adult.

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Tough one, but I was in a similar situation. I started by giving opinions that were contrary to the stance of the church: marriage equality, science not creationism, etc. From there it was gradual until it was final.

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wow!

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