I look back now that I have been atheist for about 4 years and realize the 100s of times that I struggled with what was obvious flaws in the thinking. I only had to overcome the hurdle of abusive indoctrination through finally coming to understand that I wasn't evil and dumber than everyone else. I was honest to a flaw and the "rebellion" they saw in me was that struggling to get past the pschological affects of being badgered into submission.

I have a kind of unique story as I wasn't brought up religious, and got "saved" in my late teens. It took me about 5 years of religious study to realize I had wasted a good chunk of my youth, trying to be something I was most definitely not: holy.

I was 15, finishig confirmation, when I told my pastor I didn't believe in God, in front of my mother as well. Those who grew up in the Church can probably identify how much guts that took me and how terrified my mom was, dissapointed.

I want to say that I was in my early teens. Listening to pastors and reading the bible myself...
I noticed how much of the bad shit preachers tend to skip over.
Then I started noticing how many contradictions there were in the damn thing...
I realize that it was all bullshit.