I live not in but close to one of the biggest cities in America and yet finding someone I can even just hang out with is incredibly difficult. It seems everyone is looking for something very specific and I do not fit the bill. I on the other hand am looking for something very generic and non-specific.
Admitting that seems to be working against me, seems it makes me sound "not serious", but to be fair I am not serious, you need to know someone for a while to know if you want it to be serious.
But tinder, craigslist and any number of social sites that I have posted profiles on have proven to be completely ineffectual.
Anyone have any luck with anything?
Ours has become a social media society, honesty will get you no where.
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.after i retired from the canadian air force i found that i didn't have a lot in common with non-military ppl. luckily i had the legion & golf. golfers almost always get along well. could be a sado-masochism thing.
callmedubious
Level 8
Aug 19, 2019
0
I found I struggled to make friends in USA. Back home in the north if England its easy. People just chat to you. We have gypsy people around us because its semi-rural. Very often they will not talk to the rest of us but I once got chatting to a young woman (usual about 22 with 4 kids, who left school at 8!) Anyway we were in a laundrette and she was piled high with washing so I offered her and her brood a lift home. I still see her and we chat. She calls me Jaynela. Her kids are unusual as they are still in school. My point is that sometimes you have to make the scary leap into someone else's world. Imagine the best in other people. I find if you do, you often see it reflected back.
Amisja
Level 8
Aug 19, 2019
1
My daughter is often embarrassed and impatient because I talk to everyone but it has been revealed to her more than once that you never know who your next friend is going to be. We infect met up yesterday with some people we had met a couple years ago because I had gotten to talking to them randomly. Still has not worked for anything romantic but I know many people through just being friendly.
Hard to meet someone if you are not able to articulate what you are looking for. You must have some criteria?
GreatNani
Level 8
Aug 19, 2019
0
Why?
I'm not looking for a job that I will go to every day.
Why have a criteria to define a search pattern when what your looking for is companionship, be it friend or romantic. Being specific in what you want to find only gets in the way. 100% of the people I have been with started out as acquaintances that developed into more once we had a change to get to know each other. The trouble is most people want to go STRAIGHT to relationship.
@ThomasLevi well you wouldnt be friends with everyone. There have to be certain things that are a no go or a must have. For example, no drugs or addiction for me. No religion either. There is always criteria in some way.
I did not even know that craigslist was a dating site! But seriously, This would be the right time of the year to explore the countryside, you know, away from the big city. Do you have a deadline? Sounds that way. Maybe less desparation and more appreciation of your surroundings, and that includes all the people you encounter.
Free advice from an old woman.
Spinliesel
Level 9
Aug 19, 2019
0
I agree
Dead line? I'll be dead before I cross that line.
Craigslist used to have personal, not a dating site.
I seek to meet people to find the one, not search for the one despite all the people. I am about as desperate to find someone as a panda bear strolling through the woods.
@ThomasLevi You know about pandas and mating, right? Very reluctant. But they are cute, to be sure.
@Spinliesel Well, I was speaking more to the "desperation" I have zero reluctance but I also have zero desperation, just tired of being patient.
@ThomasLevi And the alternative is what?
You could approach it scientifically: go where there are lots of females in your desired category. Use a Yenta or some other go-between.
Ask your sisters or your cousins to look out for you.
I am really getting into this. Sorry. I am having way to much fun at your expense.
I'll shut up now.
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