I have had horrible anxiety, but therapy and medication have helped. I'm able to go on a date if I can get someone to go. It's the whole asking-out-and-getting-rejected part that paralyzes me.

Yeah, everybody goes through something like that, perhaps not so intensely.

I try thinking of two things when dating: 1) be reasonably forgiving/ understanding/ easygoing of yourself...and your dates (up to a point, of course) and 2) don't set very high expectations.

Point 2 is hard for me, but I apply Point 1quite well to myself, lol.

felt like that around 14 & turned to alcohol. don't recommend it.

Therapy and medication. Exercise and overall healthier living. But it was therapy and meds that did the trick.

Let me add my puny two cents to those encouraging you to engage with a professional.

And remember, if someone is going out on a date with you they want things to work out, too. Otherwise they would not be there. And it sure looks like more than a few of us are hoping things work out well for you, too.

I went on a couple dates last year but yeah I haven’t had a relationship in years and very rarely see anyone socially unless they’re visiting from out of town. Still pretty isolated so I dunno what to tell ya, but hope it gets better soon for both of us. I prefer to have one or two close friends and see them often too, but I’m sure it would help to diversify the friend pool a little.

When it comes to getting up the courage for dates, I have a lot of nerves leading up to one (and sometimes extending during them) too, but I just have to remind myself how seldom it is to find someone local who wants to meet, who I also want to meet back. At most it happens once or twice a year if I’m lucky, so I can’t really afford not to take every chance I get. For women the dating pool is a lot less picky, so that scarcity mindset isn’t as applicable for you, except on your side of things. I guess you’ve gotta consider there are so few guys worth meeting that you might as well give it a shot if you find someone who seems like they are.

Social Anxiety can become almost Agoraphobic if you don't challenge it.

I really recommend therapy. And quite possibly medication.

You can call 211 (or go to 211.org) and find out about free or low cost help in your area.

And if you have insurance - have a medical Dr run some basic blood panels.
Social Anxiety can be exacerbated by certain simple conditions. Underactive Thyroid comes to mind - as do a few other very simple fixes.

Similar.

Please see a counselor for help with your anxiety, isolation and social awkwardness.

This is your LIFE, not a rehearsal. You do not have to live like this.