Agnostic.com

29 5

Is it o.k. to have a "crush" on someone while in a relationship?

JayJackson 7 Apr 9
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

29 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

7

I have no idea but I do have an unreasonable crush on Gal Gadot.

same.

6

Is it OK to be a human?

5

Of course it is. Love is not pie. You won't run out. What you do with that crush is what says a lot about you. You can calmly and rationally discuss the situation with your significant other, or you can do what the religions have shoved down our throats for all our lives and repress those feelings, deny them, pretend they don't exist. Or you can be a real dick and pursue your crush and hide it from your S.O.

Well put and I agree with your comment totally.

4

having a crush is fine, how you respond 2 it can be a different matter. and a lot of it depends on what kind of relationship you are in. i have friends who are in completely open relationships, i have friends who are ok with sharing an agreed upon mate, i have friends who are ok with looking and enjoy pointing out an atractive fellow or lady 2 each other, but are otherwise strictly only for each other. i have friends where none of that would be ok. as long as both/all people in a relationship are open about what they are comfortable with, there shouldnt be a problem

Byrd Level 7 Apr 9, 2018
4

One cannot control who he or she has a "crush" on. This happens too one and not by one. It might be better to keep it a secret for a while since divulging it to you mate might cause them to react irrationally and cause a lasting problem when the crush might not even last. If I were in a fulfulling relationship with a mature woman I would probably tell her about it and try to make a joke out of it and would hope that she would do the same.

4

I think it’s difficult to avoid that, what matters is if you act on it.

3

You know what makes it more alluring? When someone thinks it's not okay.

3

Absolutely. What you do about it is a matter for negotiation between the people involved.

Agreed.

2

It's almost bound to happen.

2

I think that is probably healthy. Dreaming and acting upon are different.

2

Yes, so long as you do not act on it .

2

I don't know if it is OK, but it is normal.

2

As long as you just look from afar. I have a crush on the Trivago guy.

Haha!!

2

As long as you don’t act on it.

2

What do you think? Do you really care about what I think about that?

Yet you took time out to comment. Lmao, thanks for stopping by.

@JayJackson That's what I do.

@Spinliesel does it pay well, "What you do"?

@JayJackson I get immense satisfaction from it.

@Spinliesel kinda like standing on your porch and screaming at the local neighborhood kids to get off your lawn....I get you now. Enjoy your "satisfaction".

@JayJackson Oh, how wrong you can be. But please, enjoy yourself on my behalf. Here is a little ditty for you:

@Spinliesel Wrong? Is that judgement? Lol. If you feel better then I have done my good deed for the day. You are so very welcomed.

@JayJackson Ha,ha, I feel better because The Rolling Stones sang Little Red Rooster, not because you did something. What did you do, by the way.? Never mind.It's all good.

@Spinliesel I am giving you the ATTENTION that you crave and once more you are welcomed. I am SURE you knew this, but if you needed a nudge towards reality here it is. No need to thank me, its on the house.

2

I think it's normal.

Agreed.

1

You can't help who you are attracted to but you can control what you do about it. If you find yourself attracted to someone outside of a manongamous relationship then there is a good chance there are problems with the relationship. You should either deal with those issues and work with your partner to make the relationship stronger or end the relationship.

This comment is wonderful. Thank you for it. Have a good day.

1

Yeah. It's awesome.

1

The next question, and most important, is, 'What am I going to do about this feeling?"

Me? I write about my desires. I explore the feelings via song lyrics, and some very sexually explicit stories. How is that wrong?

It isnt. Thanks for sharing.

1

I am ethically polyamorous, so, yes, I do think it's ok. And in my relationship agreement, I can even act on it if I wanted to, as long as we talked about it first.

That is the KEY in my opinion. Communication.

1

You'd have to be dead not to

Check out some of the others comments. Individuals all react differently and if you feel like you have to be dead not to, then rocj on with that thought, but not everyone feels that way....

1

Without vice, there is no virtue.

Philosophy at its best...

1

Ok to whom ?

Whether it's ok or not, I'm quite sure it happens ... we all dream, fantasize, imagine , wonder "what if" ...

Ok for you and or your partner. Relationships in my opinion tend to thrive when everything that can be open for discussion, is discussed.

1

I have never been in that situation.

1

I never felt that way when I had boyfriends.

Very interesting.

@JayJackson Yep.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:53921
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.