The Sordid Details
Okay, friends, I promised to stop tantalizing and start telling, so here goes:

I met a guy on a dating site who is 7 years older than me, but in very good shape, and reasonably nice looking. The big negative was that he (I'll call him L.), was in an open marriage (verified by his wife, who is in a BDSM relationship with another man). Since L. is not into that, he and his wife were no longer intimate. He was lonely, and looking for love. I agreed to go on dates with him, but told him very clearly that I would never consider a long-term or love relationship with a married man in any circumstance. I also said that I would never break up someone's marriage, and he said he would never leave his wife. So I figured it might be fun to go on dinner dates, concerts, hikes, etc. with L., and we would keep things light and fun. BIG NOPE. on the 3rd date, he declared his undying love for me, and began sending me poems, long strings of heart emojis and fantasies of his perceived relationship with me (in the middle of the night between 1:00 and 4:00 a.m.). I was supposed to take him to sit in with my band tonight, because I thought it would be fun, since he sings and plays guitar.

He arrived at my house acting all pissy because I failed to acknowledge that it was our one month anniversary (4th date-to-be). I reminded him that I had set clear ground rules from the beginning, but his anger began to escalate. He said that in order for him to get over me, he would have to say horrible, insulting things about me to other people. I showed him the door at that point. This left me in a pickle, because I had practiced the songs he and I were supposed to do tonight with the band, but I could no longer do them, so had to tell my band mates something unexpected came up, and boy, was I upset about that, more than anything.

There were red flags, not just the love bombing, but the fact that he told me he was on psychiatric drugs for depression (but a lot of people are), and that he did not deal well with rejection. I was so very nice to him all along, and have never had an experience like that, as people tell me I'm a nice person. I guess not falling in love with someone is a crime in his book, but I know that I dodged a bullet tonight. I just hope that he doesn't decide to start stalking me.