CHANGING YOUR OPINION
Sometimes it's hard to change your opinion of a performer, celebrity or politician. I grew up with Bill Cosby comedy albums and remembering laughing so hard I cried. Reconciling this cherished childhood memory with his serial raping seems impossible. Also liked Al Franken a LOT. These kind of diametrically opposed perceptions are hard to figure out. Not sure how to go about this. Anybody else go thru something like this? What did you do?
I don't think it your opinion of people that changes in the light of relations about their abhorrent personal lives, but your esteem.
Comedy is reliant on the likeability of the comic or the comedian.
When you don't like them as a person anymore, or lose respect for them owing to evil behaviour, their talent, while remaining unaffected is tainted.
A case in point was Fatty Arbuckle. Once accused of rape and manslaughter his reputation suffered so badly that he could never work on screen again, even after being found innocent (the girl in question Virginia Rapp died of a drug overdose) however he did work as a producer, director and writer under his actual name Roscoe Arbuckle with no change in the opinion of his actual talent.
Face it. The dude is funny relative to most humans. If that’s all you knew of him, you’d love him. The guy, however, is human and humans do fucked up shit. Once you see that other aspect, its nature overpowers anything else you know about the subject. As it should be, let him rot.
I must say that I do not put Al Franken and Bill Cosby in the same category. Was what Franken did wrong? Absolutely! Did it deserve to be acknowledged and punished? Of course. However, I do believe there is a difference between repeatedly drugging young women or getting them drunk to rape them behind closed doors because you think you are beyond the law and making a grave lapse in judgment by getting drunk and groping them in a public place, where no one took him to task at the time.
Also, I must say that we should never let our daughters, sisters, friends, sons or brothers think that they ever need to keep secrets, especially ones like this, and we need to be supportive of anyone who is brave enough to confide in us, because as we have seen, fear is one thing that can ruin someone's psyche and destroy their self-confidence. Many of us know this from experience and could have benefited from a helping hand.
This revelation crushed a beloved comedian of mine as well. I can't tell you how many times, as a young adult, I have listened to "Chocolate Cake" or the story of his wife in childbirth, or the dentist story, etc. I havent been able to enjoy them since the accusations hit critical mass years ago.
I guess I have replaced him with other comedians and just moved on.
I kinda had a tough childhood but one really good memory is sitting around as a family, and even extended family, and all of us laughing so hard at 'snakes on the floor, or the monster movie, or 'Buck-Buck' . I haven't listened to any since this all came out; wanted to but haven't.
Just had this conversation with my sister, about how Bill Cosby reminded us of our father, to the point that when she was really little, she thought that it was our dad on the tv. We’ve come to a point as a society where our heroes are failing us. It reflects our failure as society because there was (is) a list of deplorable behaviors that enjoyed our tacit approval. We’re finally getting fed up with these actions and so we rewrite (read rectify) the rules. The board gets shaken, and some people will fall off. We fix this problem by no longer tolerating the despicable and by raising the next generations to be better than we were.
When were “our heroes” ever so pure?
From George Washington to MLK Jr, we see that leaders are scarcely much “better” than the people they lead!
“We’ve come to a point as a society” where we know far more about people’s secret lives, FASTER, than ever before....
And then it all goes worldwide in MINUTES!
I think a lot of people are struggling with this. I grew up watching The Cosby Show, listening to Ted Nugent, and watching Roseanne, and now feel disgusted by each re: their actions or political views/vile stuff they have spewed.
What Al Franken did was minimal t in comparison to Cosby and the chump-in-chief, yet his followers still idolize that jackass.
I stopped trying to make sense of this fucked up world and the people in it. It's hard to explain to my kids what's going on in our society today but I just try and reach them to be better than what they have to be exposed too.
So thankful for the #metoo movement. It's about damn time women's voices are beginning to be heard.
Bill Cosby always creeped me out. He seemed to clean and patriarchal or something. Sad though.
I'm disappointed with Kid Rock now. I used to like his music and now he went all crazy right wing. Some of my fellow cooks blast it all day in the kitchen at work like an anthem and it irritates the crap out of me.
I can easily think less of him because of no strong positive memories. Maybe that's the difference?
@kmdskit3
Maybe... Think of if kiddie tv guy MR ROGERS was found to be doing little boys, FOR 40+ YEARS!!
Arill, he was America’s favorite child-sitter perhaps, but he wasn’t nearly as big an entertainer.
You could say Barack Obama caught selling crack, but even he wasn’t big enough, LONG enough, to compare!
Cos was America’s dad of course, but even bigger than his possible American seminal typecast, (America’s uncle?) Mark Twain!
Such great American love and acceptance, for a BLACK person, to rise so unstereotypically BLACK high - a great husband and father figure with an enormous income, only to fall so stereotypically BLACK low - a rapist, of WHITE women!
If he had committed MURDER he’d be better off, in the court of public opinion...
I don’t think there’s a comparison, if EVER!
It just goes to show that you can't really know someone - especially a public figure - as well as you think.
I remember at first thinking it was incredible that O.J. Simpson was suspected of murdering two people. I had seen him briefly on TV and thought he seemed gentle and personable. Our radio station also had a little jingle about "The Juice" so I had a positive feeling abut him until it became clear that his private life was very different from this public image.
The same with Cosbey. It's no wonder so many women did not call him out much sooner with his fatherly , kind-seeming kid-friendly and wise- seeming public personna. What an incredible betrayal to those who thought he was the nice guy he appeared to be and how painful it must have been for his victims.
I could name several routines I used to like. He’s an unrepentant rapist. Scum.
I drop them for what they did... getting away or not, founding a way out or not. from the pedophyle michael jackson to the serial predator of bill cosby.
I also grew up both watching Cosby on TV and listening to his stand up. I wish there was a way for me to separate the art from the artist but I think it's (for me a least ) all tainted. I can't help but to think now watching old show or listening to stand up what must have been going on behind the scenes with him. I don't need my entertainers to perfect humans but their are some things I can't get past.
I strongly agree.
If you’ve been close in the entertainment industry, you’d know how well regarded stars can be complete ugly asshole human beings. Or at least be guilty of SOME terrible things.
The only take on Cos is the AMOUNT!
But you’d HAVE TO KNOW male stars will at least hang their dicks out as far as they can!
I've found that most of my heroes have unpleasant aspects, and many are sexual perverts/predators of some kind.
Think of Michael Jackson, for instance. I still love his music but he was apparently quite a dark character, who probably would have gone to prison if he'd not been able to bribe his way out of pedophile accusations.
Talent doesn't necessarily equal goodness.
Didn't want to believe the charges against Bill Cosby - like you, I found him very funny. Al Franken should not have resigned over a poor joke made by a performer on a tour. However, I do agree with the new consciousness about how women and girls are treated.
Separation.
Being talented and funny is not inconsistent with being a vile sexual abuser.
Bill Crosby was both.
The fact that we have just learned he was the second doesn't change the fact that we already knew he was the first.
Another example was the classical composer Richard Wagner - the 'original NAZI' (though the term wasn't in use in his time), ferociously anti-semitic and thoroughly obnoxious. That doesn't, however, make the 'Ride of the Valkirie' any less spectacular.
I could name several routines I used to like. He’s an unrepentant rapist. Scum.
We have to consider that human beings are complex creatures and cannot be understood usin a one size fits all approach, or unsing jus one level of understanding. We need to understand that there is good and bad, always, in all humans; many layers of biology, learned behaviors, fears, traumas, social pressure, and a morías of other things. For most of us, the first experience with learning the complexity of people occurs when we realize that our parents are also human beings with flaws. Amd so, we need to separate the artist from the person. I still love Billy Holiday’s art even when she was such a flawed suffering person. I still love John Lennon’s art even though he was a mean borderline difficult person to deal with, and on and on. Do you think that people should stop considering all the good things you do only because you also have flaws? Let’s give ourselves a break and extend the courtesy to others; nobody is perfect, so, don’t judge others so harshly.
One thing among many I learned in the entertainment industry is that
"them that can - usually do".
If people knew what most of their icons, idols, do when off camera.....
Well..... people are people.
Yes Rolf Harris in the UK but it is what it is.
I really think Cos has been punished enough, effectively...
He should probably be jailed at home, with his wife, not being allowed to go out without her permission!
But really. He is DONE! He’s blind(?) and no doubt his dick doesn’t work anymore...
He’s no longer “a threat to society”.
Any gal that sits down to have a drink with him should KNOW what may happen!
Of course that’s all true of Harvey Weinstein too!
People need to realize that even famous “nice” people are also shitty individuals...
But I can see how advertisers and other public entities will certainly drop him.
Regular people too.
I just don’t see how people are always fooled into thinking public persona equates to REAL persona...
It’s Cosby’s doing too but you gotta be an IDIOT to not realize that 98% of everyone and everything popular, is BS !!