Agnostic.com

43 9

What is the most effective way to deal with Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons or other religious door knockers?

By snytiger69
Actions Follow Post Like

Post a comment Add Source Add Photo

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

43 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

1

I had a friend that pretty much did this. THey would still stay until he just shut the door in their faces

btroje Level 9 May 2, 2018
1

Once I yelled over my shoulder "is the chicken sacrifice ready yet?" They left right away. smile001.gif

poetdi56 Level 7 May 2, 2018
5

We had an old man called Jim who used to come to our house probably twice a month, my Dad invited him in and he'd have a cup of tea and tell a couple of jokes and chat about some general topical theme, then he would find a passage in his bible and try to apply it and we'd maybe disagree or maybe politely listen, but we understood that he felt it was his purpose to teach us but otherwise he was just a nice old chap who came for a chat and a cuppa. He knew we didn't believe and didn't push it, and we knew what he believed was bollocks but we didn't push that either.
I think the best thing to do is realise most people are just trying to do good in their own way and be respectful, if they're a dick then you don't have to talk to them again do you?

0

All you need to be polite and say "oh sorry, I was excommunicated last year". Not only will they go away, your house will be blacklisted as they can't be seen with such heathens!

0

All you need to be polite and say "oh sorry, I was excommunicated last year". Not only will they go away, your house will be blacklisted as they can't be seen with such heathens!

0

All you need to be polite and say "oh sorry, I was excommunicated last year". Not only will they go away, your house will be blacklisted as they can't be seen with such heathens!

0

I tell them I'm an atheist. When they ask why? I say that no gods were ever real.
That's usually enough to do it.

KKGator Level 9 May 2, 2018
1

Back in the day, I was over a friend's when 2 JWs knocked on the door. He answered, and they introduced themselves. He invited them to tell him their whole spiel. I gave him this "wtf are you doing?" look, and he gave me the "don't worry, this will be good" look.
At the end, they offered him a watchtower, for a small donation. He gave them like a buck, and took it. At which point, he asked them "this is mine? I can keep this?" And they replied of course. He proceeded to reach into his pocket, pull out a bic lighter, and burn it in front of them.
They never came back. Lol

msar0414 Level 6 May 2, 2018
2

depends a bit on your objective. do you want them to stay away, do you want to make unbelievers of them, do you want to waste their time so they aren't pestering someone else?

hankster Level 9 May 2, 2018
3

My most successful strategy involved answering the door shirtless brushing my teeth. There was about six inches of snow on the ground and I just stood there blocking the door brushing my teeth until the guy just left after a minute or two. He never came back.

geist171 Level 6 May 2, 2018
1

Keep your front door locked. If you do not know who it is, do not open the door. If it's my mother, do not open the door. I keep a baseball bat right where the hinges are.

0

LOL. That might work, but I wouldn't do it to the letter carrier.

Trod Level 5 May 2, 2018
1

They stopped coming around my way after stopping by and being invited in to blaring black metal, not satanic (too gimmicky), but nature oriented lyrics. I was told that I was a heathen and I was going to hell.

Meh.

1

I just say I'm not interested, and close the door in their faces.

marga Level 7 May 2, 2018
3

Ha, an old girlfriend of mine answered the door naked and invited them in.

2

I would always prove I know more about their religion than they do. Then convert them away from their fantasies, into reality. They don't come to my door anymore.

Meiliken Level 6 May 2, 2018
1

I wish I had this problem. The only proselytizers I've ever had to deal with ambushed me after a fishing trip, walking back to my car. We got to talking about the old testament. That worked for me; they really knew nothing about it, only carried the new. They couldn't address any of my questions, so eventually had to move on.

3

Super soaker?

Yeah, that sounds good. Hit them int he crotch area and then you also spare all your neighbors.

2

This remembers me of a time in my younger days. JW would come knocking on the door every saturday morning. If you have ever gone clubbing the night before early morning visitors are not on your top ten to do on a saturday.
One saturday i was so pissed off i look them straight in the eye and told them i worshiped the devil.
They never returned..

Rdurham Level 5 May 2, 2018
2

That wouldn't put them of.A swift kick in the genital region works a treat.

Coldo Level 8 May 2, 2018
4

I’m a confirmed INFJ/ introvert. I don’t answer my door, unless it’s family; they text first. I don’t answer my phone, either, lol. Same criteria.

@Billboy That’s a scary big dick, even I would run, lol!

3

One time I had some religious nuts show up on my property. I said to them, "If you don't leave, I will call the cops on you." I never seen them sense.

3

Tell them you are an Atheist. It has yet to fail me.

Sticks48 Level 9 May 2, 2018

I've tried that. They get get excited about wanting to save me.

@snytiger6 Don't smile when you say it. Attitude is everything when you want to get rid of people. Practice your mean face if you are so inclined to be a nice person all the time. ?

@Sticks48 That must be it. I am a nice person.

@snytiger6 I'm sorry. ?

5

That's easy.

?

With that door knocjer, ansering the door naked would be a logical expectation.

4

My mother is a JW and they have a 'No Call List' just ask them politely but firmly to be put on that list and they will no longer call on you. If they do then just mention to them that you have already politely asked them not to call on you and that you would appreciate if they would respect your wishes. Sometimes they check just to be sure that you really, really, really don't want them trying to save you before Christ and his Angels come back and slaughter all the non-JW's until the world runs ankle deep in the blood and guts of the 'worldly' people who did not heed their call. I know, it's seriously fucked up but what do you expect when dealing with religious crazies? smile002.gif

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text 'q:71693'.
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content read full disclaimer.
  • Agnostic.com is a non-profit community for atheists, agnostics, humanists, freethinkers, skeptics and others!