So long as you continue to focus on your child and the best interest of your child you will do the right thing. I i don't know how old your kid is but since you wrote that the separation began 2 years ago in guessing the kid is older than 3 years old. If the kid is 7 years old or older you can have an idea of how what has already has happened has been effecting him/her. Some kids are really effected by the back and forth and others kind of enjoy it. Each separation is different between separating spouses and each kid processes it a little differently depending on the relationship the child feels they have with each parent and how relevant they have been made to feel in the entire mix. I wish all involved the best outcome possible.

So long as you continue to focus on your child and the best interest of your child you will do the right thing. I i don't know how old your kid is but since you wrote that the separation began 2 years ago in guessing the kid is older than 3 years old. If the kid is 7 years old or older you can have an idea of how what has already has happened has been effecting him/her. Some kids are really effected by the back and forth and others kind of enjoy it. Each separation is different between separating spouses and each kid processes it a little differently depending on the relationship the child feels they have with each parent and how relevant they have been made to feel in the entire mix. I wish all involved the best outcome possible.

I would talk to an attorney about full custody and what your chances may be. If they say you probably won’t get it, I would still hire someone to at least get legal and physical 50/50 so she can’t keep getting more time with your daughter.

Your ex is obviously not rational. You did your best to work with her and compromise. She’s not reciprocating the courtesy....time to make it legal.

Best of luck to you and your daughter!

In most states you do not need a lawyer torequest visitation, it is considered a Right and in the best interest of the child. Furthermore, established times/places keeps the peace and is good for all of you.
If you want full custody you need not only a lawyer but to document weirdness...a simple notebook with dates/times, a sentence of detail will be thrilling to whomever you hire!

The unfortunate thing is that if you go full custody you will need a lawyer anyway. There are tricks and loopholes that the average person isn't aware of and that a person representing himself might be too close to in order to see even if they do know there are loopholes. The courts tend to still favor the mother, especially in younger children so unless she's doing something abusive or honestly neglectful, they might not give you full custody. However if you are just looking for equal time because she's being controlling and erratic with your time, you might have a case... especially if you have already agreed on joint parenting. You will have to record all your time and keep it as precise as you can. Have witnesses, friends and family members who can confirm things should also be worked out. The more clear you are the more likely you will be able to settle this with a judge on board.

For the record, no, I don't think you are wrong.

Write everything down get evidence of what she is doing . Take the rose tinted glasses off . She is not abusing the child but it can be argued she is neglecting her basic needs . Get a lawyer that knows marriage law or find a charity that gives advice . It's gonna get nasty try and be polite and respectful and keep your cool it will not be easy .

Decide w h at is best for the child and fight like he'll for it.

You are in a sad spot. Your daughter will have two homes now, that looks pretty certain from your info. I am wondering if it does make good sense for you to get an attorney since you are not divorced. Nothing is settled and moving toward an adjustment out of the marriage. If you get an attorney, you can request a certain amount of time with your daughter. On worrying about what is taking place at your ex’s house, concerning your daughter, I would try and stay away from that worry! I would take in information that your child might report, but I would not interrogat her. If your child has an attentive, loving father that is interested in her...that will be enough on your part! When possible you could try to communicate with your ex, on things about your daughter, but don’t stake your hopes on too much at the moment! Focus on being the best dad that you be for your daughter! Your ex, may have some growing up of her own to do! Try and shift any fear, to a belief that ‘life’ works out everywhere...just not always in a straight line and at the very least don’t undermine your ex in any way. But having some clear boundaries is better for parents and child.

It's a difficult story. Especially since there are always two perspectives. Does your daughter want to live with Dad? That would probably work in your favor if she does. My understanding is that you not paying child support through a court system puts you at a huge disadvantage. So much so that if you take your wife to court and sue for custody, you may be required to pay "back pay" because whatever this-and-thats in financial support you've provided, potentially don't amount to anything unless documented, stamped, accepted, and approved by a judge. Many non custodial parents believe its cheaper and less hassle to simply have an agreement with the custodial parent, until a situation like the one you've described here happens. Also this: When your daughter is with her mother, she is the parent for that time period. And her values and beliefs will be part of the household she keeps. You don't have control. It's the same when your child is with you. Wanting control isn't a very healthy reason to want custody. But if you truly believe yourself just as competent and loving, and if you think it's a benefit and enhancement to the well being of your daughter because you care, I'd fight for custody. I hope for the best outcome for the three of you.