Can you "read" a person?
I can pick up a sense about someone, by the way they act or what they say (or don't say), but I'm not a mind-reader and don't know what they're feeling unless they tell me.
Growing up it was almost expected that I was supposed to "know," so I was always guessing and living in anticipation of everything, and of course if I read someone incorrectly it was my fault. And it kind of screwed with my head because I thought that's what people did, so I learned not to say anything, but then I would also be disappointed when people weren't "reading" me and didn't act the way I liked. And if they were direct with me, it would freak me out because I wasn't used to that, either.
Never really learned to say what I felt - or even that I had a right to say it - until I was an adult, and even then it was a learning curve. I've even been called on it a few times by trusted friends, who make me feel safe enough about it to acknowledge, "oh yeah, you're right." As I've gotten older I think I've gotten much more bold in my directness, and in doing so I'm also noticing 1) I'm more and more comfortable with other people who are direct, 2) more aware of how much people aren't that way, and 3) more aware how some are taken aback by what I say. And I'm not even saying anything unkind, just speaking straight.
Makes it so much easier though than to try and "read" each other.
7
Enjoy being online again!
Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.Create your free account
28 comments (26 - 28)
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.Yes I can read a person. I'm a people watcher so very good at studying body language. I'm hardly ever wrong on it either. There's certain signs I look at when talking to people or watching other people and can sense when they are uncomfortable or lying
royboy50
Level 2
July 8, 2018
0
In some ways I am, in other ways I am pretty cue blind - I was a lecturer in Rogerian person centred counselling for many years - so if i am one to one with someone I can get them pretty well and see where they are coming from - Now I am living in a country I didnt start out from and so the clues are not there and obviously if they arent my clients I am not going to have rapport with them - sometmes I can barely make out what they are saying, even if its just a greeting. where i am living is far more religous than anything i have ever experienced before so as an atheist that is part of the mix too as I don't speak that language either - but non eof it is any bother to me as I am now 70y.o and pretty much out of the game - Nice when I meet someone I click with no bother if I don't .
jacpod
Level 8
July 11, 2018
0
I don't think I can read a person
But I can "smell" things
Hate, animosity, stress, disdain.
I can smell and see these things on a person
I have an ex, she literally reeks of these aforementioned things
It keeps our interactions heavily strained and restrained.
She denies that she feels this way, but she knows she can't lie to me.
We don't talk often and Im inclined to believe its a good thing, well, for me anyway.
Tedster
Level 3
July 12, 2018
0
Enjoy being online again!
Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.Create your free account
Share this post
Categories
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.