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Anyone ever get the feeling you're going to be forever alone?

I often get the feeling that if 'it' were going to happen for me it would have done so by now. I'm beginning to think I'm not ever going to get to be in love and its depressing as hell, frankly.

By SkepChik5
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46 comments

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1

“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.”

  • Robin Williams
    That was my life through my 20’s. Then I got a divorce and haven’t looked back. Still alone but happy.
1

I'm 57 and I don't feel that way. There's no one "it." Hang in there. =]

IAMGROOT Level 7 Nov 29, 2018
0

I understand this post. This is my feelings sometimes. But just know... you are not A.lone.

WeaZ Level 7 July 7, 2018
0

Yes, especially if your a introvert like me. Keep saying one of the days

LutherMaze Level 2 June 18, 2018
1

I feel similarly. I would like very much to find a woman and fall in love with her, and as I grow older I expect it probably will never appen. However, I do believe it's better to be alone than to be in a miserable relationship or marriage. There are so many potential problems with marriage. Plus, I often can enjoy my own company pretty well.

0

Absolutely. I'm more than a little convinced that I'm just a forever alone type. At nearly forty I'm pretty sure I would have made/found something that worked for me by now. smile003.gif

0

I honestly have started thinking the same way now. smile003.gif

Flynn Level 3 Jan 31, 2018
1

There is nothing wrong with being single. I am a fellow Tampa Bay resident. maybe we will chat more over time.

2

For me, it seems that being in love has happened more than once. But the relationships didn't last. So I'm not sure if that wasn't really love. The longest was for 12 years, so I would think that's more than an infatuation, but I've probably got way more questions about the whole thing than answers. I'm pretty sure I've got a level of depression related to body chemistry rather than outside events, so does love even feel the same way for me? I did learn along the way that I do not need to be with someone else to be happy. That also probably varies from person to person however. I know some pretty unhappy people who feel the same way that you do.

2

I get the feeling my perpetual solitude isn't based solely on my choices. Other's freedom to choose has it's effect. Some people can't handle some aspects of my personality. At least, this is what I tell myself.

Gohan Level 7 Jan 6, 2018
2

I figure I'm there. I would like a partner but keep finding old men who still think they want sex. At this age, dying having sex is a badge for men, another cleanup problem for women. We're not the same, nope, not at all.

Waco2017 Level 4 Jan 5, 2018

Damn that sounds like a nightmare

1

Sorry you're down. I'm single for the first time in 20 years at 37. I'm in kind of a different boat of feeling weird being single again, but also positive about being able to do whatever I want without having to check in with someone. I suppose their pros and cons for whatever situation we're in. Hoping for the best for you!

pitnerd Level 4 Jan 5, 2018

Thanks. Hope you're enjoying your freedom as well. smile001.gif

2

I know what you're going through. Never thought I would be alone at this age either. If you have a group of strong, supportive friends don't ever take that for granted because often that can be more necessary than long-term monogamy. When you have that deep, loving connection with someone it can change you in ways you never thought possible but it's duration is never guaranteed. Seeking out that kind of connection is not a waste of time but it should never be an expectation. Take care.

kmdskit3 Level 8 Jan 5, 2018

Good friends can be a real treasure.

3

I get that feeling on occasion. My husband of 13 years died 5 years ago. We had a great friendship and were a comfy pair of old jeans together. He is missed. With him went any desire to put myself out there and I wonder if I will ever find that kind of friendship again. Still, I do enjoy my own company.

I'm sorry. smile003.gif

3

I've been married twice to men who lied (to themselves and to me) about their lack of belief; it caused all kinds of problems as the marriages progressed (respect was lost on all sides & once that goes & resentment creeps in, you're done).
I will NEVER date, let alone get serious about, a believer again. I recognize that this may have me on my own for the rest of my life, but having been on both sides of the fence, I can say the grass is PLENTY green here!
No compromising of my thoughts/actions, AND sole possession of the remote control... Trust me, it's nice to have a GOOD, solid partner - but being alone is 1000Xs better than being with one who isn't.
(& if you need friends, I'm right across the Howard Franklin)

Kirahere Level 6 Jan 4, 2018

I hear you. I've dated crazy religions Christian wickin(sp). Not long term by any means. Of course if one doesn't date religious than one doesn't really date much. We are surrounded.

1

I live alone. I will die alone. I'm pretty comfortable with it most days.

JLFowler Level 6 Jan 4, 2018
4

I'm turning 60 this weekend, and I've been divorced for about 9 years. I thought I met my soul mate once, but it didn't work out. I've dated off and on, nothing has been serious. And I live in a conservative state, and I'm anything but conservative. The odds are that I will never find a mate. After being unhappily married for too many years I realized I'm better off single then I was when I was married. I don't have to put up with anyone's BS. If I need help I can call my kids, but frankly it pleases me inordinately to do things myself. After years of subtly being told I wasn't capable or smart enough, I am capable and I'm definitely smart enough. I'm being very selective about who I spend time with cuz frankly I don't have time to waste. My advice to you is to become who you were meant to be. Do what you love, invest your time in you. Be happy with you, and if you find someone that is good, and if you don't you're your own best companion.

This is awesome. Good for you!

6

When I was single, I had a group of friends I hung around with. It made being single a lot of fun, but I still wanted someone to build a life with. I was mid 40s when I met my wife, and we are very happy. Don't give up, just be happy. Have fun while you're young.

3

I’ve been there, and I’ve felt that. I thought I’d found someone, and she turned out to be insane. I really had to wonder about my luck, but, what are you going to do? There’s only one life, and however we may want to believe we can make it alone, we all need one another. Keep on looking and be careful about who you choose and remember that they’re looking for the same thing too.

I think one of mine was insane, too. But it was progressive and insidious. Didn't really see it until it was really bad.

Same here. By the time she had my daughter it was too late.

3

This is the longest I've been alone in my life (I've been in long-term relationships pretty much continuously since I was 17, the last of which ended April 2017) and I'm loving it at the moment. I would only give it up for someone who made me happier than I am and that's a high bar right now. I do have my son 50% of the time so I'll add that caveat, but... yeah!

0

My dear sister in spirit...i am 69 1/2 years old and never, through 2 marriages lasting almost 40 years have I been anywhere near as happy as I am right now, single & free, And a truly lovely romance blooming, I think/hope, right now. Being part of a couple is no answer to anything! They can verbally & physically abuse you to the point of scars, even near death. (hubby #1, 5 years)They can seem lovely to everyone around you and you are left wondering why you feel so sad & alone, you must be crazy, ungrateful, or just stupid......and what a demanding nag you are for expressing your sadness! (hubby #2, 34 years). Make Yourself happy....no holiday goes by that I do not gift myself something lovely, sometimes more than one thing! A day does not go by without enjoying a moment of pure relief that I am free to create my own heaven. If this potential romance blossoms, icing on the cake, but in no what responsible for my basic happiness, just an enhancer.
Be careful what you wish for, and especially beware thinking that your happiness depends on someone else...that thinking will sour Any relationship, despite all the drivel in popular songs....which make me cringe!
P.S. listen to what I tell you instead of going through all the crap I did to find it out for yourself, Please!

0

I get that feeling all the time. I would really like to have a partner, but I have been alone for so long I'm not sure if I'd know how to 'be' in a relationship.

icolan Level 7 Jan 4, 2018
5

Some of you writing "Me too" are so young! Patience, grasshoppers. People wrote some really good and supportive suggestions. I just want to add that the average age these days is what -- 78? Unless you are all 77 years old, you still have time for love, committed relationships, marriage, etc. Hang in there and enjoy the time between now and when you commit to show up (emotionally, physically, mentally) every day for somebody.

BlueWave Level 8 Jan 4, 2018
0

My thing is I know how to be alone, nothing says I have to like it. I often think that I might be a tad complexed to have that enigma of lifelong love or the simulation of such ever come together.

azzow2 Level 9 Jan 4, 2018
1

My guess is that you might be just too "cool" for most people.
Hang in there, someone will come along and appreciate you, as they should .
Whatever you do, don't force it !

Buddha Level 7 Jan 4, 2018
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