I do a thing with that thing with strings and I hit the strings with a thing and they go ping.

I get dressed up in odd clothes, along with other even more odd humans. We do stuff on a stage, and even MORE odd humans than us, pay money to watch and listen as we do some pretty odd stuff in public ! And it's oddly satisfying ...

I use polyhedrons as weapons to kill imaginary monsters once a week.

Meeting people and getting them drunk with the express intent to steal their stories.

I have more than one hobby, but not quite four. In some of my hobbies I sit where most people normally sit to eat. There is lots of plastic, card and paper. You pick some of it up, put some of it down, and move some of it around. Other people are there too, they do similar things but not at the same time.

In another of my hobbies I have these devices, I've had some of them for years- those are the worst because they used to make my hands hurt. After a long time you can get them to make noises that other people are attracted to... But sometimes they say "I don't get it".

In my last hobby I find large geological structures that are near where the earth's crust can't decide which way it's going. You try to get to the top of them for absolutely no reason at all, and when you get there, there is sometimes a German or Dutch couple in sandles who don't seem tired at all, and have somehow carried an entire meal up with them, and you sort of feel disappointed in yourself when that happens.

I put something large and throbbing between my legs and make it go as fast as I can and hope to have it all over in 10 seconds.

I take my narrow blackpad and press on and I see a picture and someone is talking about something happening or something that happened. I put a black object on my lap and open up a black square thing. Use my fingers and they start pressing these little black pads that go up and down and letters appear on a rectangular screen.

I sic ghosts and vampires on innocent, unsuspecting victims.

I hit things with sticks and make them go BOOM!

I'll start.
I hang out with a lot of ladies who might possibly smell like meat who are dressed up in office attire playing with dogs.

I buy different bottles of fermented grape juice, consume said juice and talk about the relative merits of the different ones. Then I explain to some people why I won't be driving my car any time soon.

I hang out with other n'er do wells in bar rooms and taverns, with wood and metal objects hung over our shoulders or on the ground in front of us, abusing said objects in a somewhat rhythmic / melodic fashion. We generate a large amount of noise in exchange for alcohol and money.

When i'm not doing that, i officiate ceremonies to celebrate civil unions that most people attach religious meaning to.

I take the little stick thingy and bleed it all over the dead tree skin, making shapes that eventually puke out my thoughts.

I drive my neighbors crazy with electric guitar practice at 3AM.

I can sit, kneel and stand on this huge thing. I do have a waggy thing that helps me move around.

drinking beer on the front porch engaging all who pass by

I pick up the weight. I set down the weight. I pick up... (I do truly despise Planet Fitness)

Well I purchase these round pieces of plastic, which are over priced, and I put them in a machine that makes out with them, because I hear strange noises sometimes, and then this image thingy pops up on a glass box, and I get to use another piece of plastic with all these buttons on it that sometimes makes what happens on this glass frame do things.

Hobby: I subject myself to very uncomfortable situations in order to experience mild arrhythmia, fight-or-flight response, and endorphin release cascade (not necessarily in that order) by abusing my body to do things "normal" people consider unsanitary ( or dangerous, or stupid, really) such as sleeping on the ground in all weather, finding myself in questionable places alone or with equally mentally challenged people, and many more.

Work/hobby: #1. I take things, look at them, go "hmmmmm, what is this crap now", push them through a narrow tube, and electrocute them. #2. Then I take body parts, grind them up, and try to find the "crap" from step #1, which is then analyzed in weird looking backstreets of software industry. Approximately 3 nervous breakdowns, countless pots of coffee, and unreasonable number of junk food later, I write a half-page report on "How I spent the last 3 years of my life"

Makin trees that make fruit ~

Using heat, I liquify large amounts of white or colored solids, add some brightly colored tiny solids, and pour expensive oil into the liquid. I then wait for it to cool a little bit, then pour the liquid into glass or metal containers with pieces of string sticking out at the top. When they are cooled down, I put stickers on the container, sometimes I decorate the containers for holidays or special occasions. I then sell them or give them away as gifts.

1. Watch images that move around, with sounds.

2. Read things splashed in ink onto pieces of squashed dead trees.

3. Aim a thing at another thing, then a chemical reaction makes a loud bang, and a chunk of lead and copper flies very very fast from the first thing and hits the second thing.