Someone came to work late once and just said "I would have been on time but I didn't really want to." Good to be honest at least.

I remember being in school, my then best friend walked into class a full 30 minutes late. The teacher asked him for an explanation. “Traffic was bad” he said.

...he lived across the road from school. We laughed for ages.

I've never attempted to excuse myself from being late - I made clear to all of my employers that I would likely be late reporting to work and if that meant that I wouldn't receive the full raise that was OK. They accepted it and it was never a problem because when I did arrive I performed and got sh@t done on time. As a result, I always received my full raise and I think that's because they appreciated the honesty.

Keeping in the theme of this community, “I was preoccupied. God moves in mysterious ways.”

Heard: "My cat puked in my shoe"

Used: (I was living in Louisiana near the Mississippi river). "There are gators between my house & the car & I am not going to fight dinosaurs with a broom to come into work." (They had actually told me to shush the gators away with a kitchen broom)

A student failed to have her paintings ready for her Senior exhibition. Her water heater exploded a month prior and ruined them.

I have been late several times going to remote Thailand schools because public transport songtheah wouldn't stop for me. I had to ask my boss for a lift a couple of times before I learned to take a songtheah to an intersection south of town where all the songtheaw had to stop.

I usually err in the direction of early, so it isn't a common problem for me.

I worked in HR, I have heard them all.

A family member had a Quaker parakeet who hated everyone but her. One morning she was late to work because the parrot attacked my sister and got tangled in her super thick hair! ?