That was 6 years ago, when I started to critically ask question about mormon doctine and until I find no reason to believe it all true, including God's existence. Not easy to deconvert oneself, there is a struggle since you live a life in a the movement for 36 years.
I never accepted the existence of God, having already become aware that things like dinosaurs once existed and that the Earth had been here for a very long time by the time I heard the myths when I first went to school. I was honestly very surprised when I discovered that, unlike the other stories teachers read to us from books at school, some people believed these ones to be true.
Even when I was little I noticed, to my chagrin, that I got everything I prayed for, good or bad. Often, after I got something, I didn't even want it.
I wondered about that, since supposedly "god" was answering and would only give me "good" things.
I also noticed that I was getting things I just thought about wanting..without even praying.
Then I noticed that the great warm presence I felt in my life, that told me what was going to happen and what to do wasn't making judgement calls, or calling anything I wanted "evil," even when it contradicted what I'd been taught in church.
I finally asked the presence I'd always assumed was god, "Are you God, or are you me, " and the answer was "Yes."
So, I knew I was god. I had been making everything happen by deciding it, as quantum mechanics says..nothing exists that wasn't imagined first.
So, physics indicates that we are participating in creating our own universes/reality.
“I regard consciousness as fundamental and matter as derivative from consciousness." – Max Planck, theoretical physicist who originated quantum theory, 1918 Nobel Prize in Physics