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What are the ground rules in dating?

Are men still having to make the first move? Who is espected to pay? Do people still do dates? Is sex on the first meeting normal now?

Traveling4ever 4 Jan 16

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I have suggested meeting to guys on dating sites. I am all for meeting face to face . We can go dutch but it should be discussed. I still expect to do dates but I am open to what that means. Probably not to sex on first dates.


Simple respect


I figure these things have to get worked out between the people on the date. Should probably work out who's paying at the very least before you agree to the date. The notion that the man has to pay seems kind of out moded in the age of equality, as does the notion of the man making the first move. Equality should mean equality, not cherry-picking the parts that appeal to you but clinging to the more mercenary aspects of it all.


There are rules????


Get off your knees !


I don't think there are rules anymore,
I always pay/provide on the first meeting,
my rule was, I would pay when out for dinner or whatever, and the lady would cook if at her place, in the last 20 years, few women seem to cook, instead they come here for meals.
I always wait for the woman to hint sex is an option, 25% of the time it is not on the initial meeting, but on the first real date, 25% of the time on the second, if it hasn't happened by the 4th it won't which is fine by me I have made lots of friends. If offered sex, I usually take up the offer, women seem comfortable with me and if it has been a while for some reason I seem to fit the bill. I have only ever knock 3 women back in recent years and that was because their personalities were offensive. Not nice people at all, and it was only courtesy that I saw the dates through to conclusion.


I'm 80 and completely confused. I've started to date again after losing my wife of 57 years. Things have changed a bit.

Do you have to check on each move, e.g., is this all right? Are you comfortable with this?

Money seems to be just one of the unstated expectations. How frequently do we want to make contact is another.

  1. Act like a grown-up.*
  • Don't make assumptions, be truthful, say what you feel, ask for what you want, pay attention, use your head, ask questions, be respectful, use your manners

Bravo, @stinkeye_a!


I think men are expected to pay for a date in general, but the woman’s always right, if she want to pay, then accept it thankfully, she’s not taking your manhood. That’s about the only sound advice iv got. On my last first date, we just went streight to her place and annoyed her neighbors all night, but I might be the first to tell you that that can distract you from the kind of person they really are. I urge you to get to know them first, hormones are really strong.


Be kind. Be honest. Be courteous. Don't be too serious.

Listen to people when they tell you who they are.

Other then that, anything goes - whatever the parties involved decide ! No rules will apply to everyone.


Can't answer with certainty have not been on a date in so long. I think that you have to check the disclaimer in the email/text before you can even talk to someone face to face these days.


I learned something this morning that I will like to use. I turned it into some kind of disclaimer... "You Have the Right and Obligation at any given moment to Remove Consent for any reason you feel necessary."


There is no normal. id be myself and play it by ear. its the company you keep and not where you keep it.


More damned trouble than it's worth!


I don't think there are any norms. I feel anything that's agreed on is ok. including sex. It's not always the man that wants sex on the first date. For me personally, I'm not easy lol



Ok but experience if a female makes the first move she’s easy
If the man asked the female out he should expect to pay. Personally, I would still offer to pay tip or next activity on the date
Folks rarely like to call them dates in fear of ???? It’s do you want to hangout or meet up.
I don’t think sex on a first meeting is normal. Perhaps a kiss.


Don’t be an asshole

Lol! I think that applies pretty much across the board


I asked the same questions-

First move-nice if guy makes it

Paying:nice if guy pays, however can go dutch if prearranged

Dates-a date can be anything-my 1st was walking our dogs-led to dinner

Sex on first meeting-None of the guys I've dated suggested it.

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