I'd take my chances going out on dates. Besides they are fun, make me feel special being a transgender woman, and give me the opportunity to wear my best dress and high heels.

It depends on your level of introversion vs extroversion. If you're an introvert, try going out to meet new people, and find somebody you might like to get to know more on a personal level. Extroverts tend to be more outward anyways, so in my experience they tend to be a little to forward as well. So if you're more of an extrovert, let them come to you. But I'm no expert so what do I know?

I've always figured that if I want something badly enough, I need to at least make some sort of effort. Of course there are the serendipitous stories we all hear. But in most of reality, desirable folks don't come door-to-door looking for a relationship with you .

Separating now from STBXW, this is not an academic question. Get on OLD and see if I can fill the gap in my life? Or get my head together on my own? Fortunately I enjoy my own company which makes it an easier choice.

Sounds like the consensus is for 2, and that makes sense. But does it still hold true for nearly 50 year old males? There doesn't seem like a lot of time left to trust in synchronicity.

So, I take your question to mean: Should I ask a person on a date if you don't know them well Vs asking one out that you do know. I would choose the latter because you wouldn't (probably) be asking them out solely based on their looks.

I have been waiting my whole life..... Ain't dead yet

I am hoping someone just shows up at my door wanting to play Call of Duty. Is that an option?

Preferably meet someone by happenstance, but not all of us are social butterflies.

Why not both?

We all feel or felt that way. I have dated a ton in my life, Married twice, divorced twice. Now is my late 60's I realize that the search for "the one" depends who is searching. When I was younger I thought the one was the one because I felt that special feeling. Not true. IT is what I am willing to do regarding myself. I now realize that many times I just believed because I wanted too. I was not able to be my real self, I did not know my real self. Now in the proper state of mind I see that listening to the real voice in your head is the answer, but you must be willing to listen to your own rationalization and lies. That is so very tricky.
NO need to date hoping to expand your horizons. the old saying that you find them when you are not looking is very true to heart. The key is NOT to be looking and just be yourself. Someone notices the confidence you have in being yourself and that is never not attractive.

I vote for number 2. Real dates wth an almost stranger can be too awkward.

there is no one answer that fits everyone. that is up to the individual. if you enjoy dates, go on dates! if you would rather just engage in activities where it is possible to meet people, do that. if you like both, do both.

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