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Anyone else have a psychotic parent or close family member?

Our mother had 8 children from at least four different men (no big deal to me). I was #6 and remained the baby until I was 12 when she got married to a family friend (my sisters ex) and had two kids with him.
Although I cannot prove it and really do not want to know for sure I am pretty certain she poisoned my brother's cat because he paid more attention to it tan to her.
She had designer clothing and her own tailor while we wore whatever we could find that wasn't too dirty. I will spare you the gory details but she made Mommy Dearest look mild and I thought maybe I should share in case someone else out there is trying to cope with someone in their life but don't know it is okay to talk about it.
My email address is medida03@gmail.com if anyone needs to talk about anything at all. Do not remain silent anymore. Support is right here!

Dida 7 Feb 10
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14 comments

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0

My ex-wife.... Even her children don't speak to her anymore and my daughter was convinced for years I was a horrible person. We just got back in contact recently and she is figuring out just how much different I am than she was told. I have seven grandchildren now and all of them think I am a really nice guy even though I am not acting any different than I usually do.

0

Thank you Dida. I think about him a lot, sometimes I cry but have to move on. I tried to help him, he's almost 32 years old. Its out of my hands now. I can only wish him well but he's toxic and I can't have toxic people in my life.

@Dida Well thanks again. What's sad is one of my sisters did lose a son, he was murdered. Sometimes I feel so guilty but the circumstances are different.

1

I grew up in an abusive household and thankfully had the wit to move out at 15y.o. my father was abusive and mother was mentally unwell - I had a brother 8 years older than me whom I havent seen for over 30 years as he got off too. I think in some ways it was good preparation for meeting the outside world which I innocently thought was everything my family were not - so quite a shock to find the same kind of violence out there in the world - and as I have grown older I am more and more in control of my own responses to 'not love ' 'not kindnesses' I have no trouble walking away from people who are unkind.

thank you Dida I am pretty comfortable these days and have also learned to take care of myself - when I was younger I taught myself not to feel cold, tired or hungry but I met someone later on, who taught me to act as if I felt those things and it really worked a treat and thank you of r your offer mine is on the table too.

1

They all are including me , but I'm the only one who will do anything about it . Everyone else prays away the psychosis , & it does not work ! 😟

Dougy Level 7 Feb 11, 2018
1

My son is psycho. He verbally abused me, along with destroying my house, lived in filth. I believe he is bi-polar but would not get help. It's been a year since I kicked him out, our last communication was a horrible text message he sent to me on Christmas night.

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I feel honored to be in this group of growth health and honesty. ....stay safe everyone. ...keep sharing your serenity. ...the abundance of compassion here is awesome. ...hugs y'all

0

Yes. My mother was the enabler my father the racist my eldest brother the brutal drunk on first liberty home from the Navy @ 17 ....luckily there is something called: " NEGATIVE RE-ENFORCEMENT " I did not want to be anything like them. ...my earliest hero was Einstein and when Walt Disney died all his science and nature films won the obituary title of Atheist. ...have never feared leaving the closet under heavy MCarthyistic threats since 1967

2

I have close family that have gotten into METH and ruined their life's and became psychotic. So sad

2

My dad was a fall down drunken drug addict. He abused OTC and Rx painkillers and booze all of his life and my mother was his enabler. He died in June. People ask me if I miss him. "No, I do not" I can mourn for what should have been but not for what 'was'. He was definitely a psychopath and the substance abuse worsened it. The psychopathology wasn't because of the addictions. I could tell you stories...

1

You have a very sad story. It calls to mind the report about the parents of those 15(?) children who were starved, etc. I have my "issues", my home life was far from idyllic though not as tortuous as others experienced. I've spent many years in psychotherapy, yet I still find it difficult to "let go" completely.

2

I understand the company that I am in here! Yes, I did have similar experience, over my whole life, I waffled between hoping my mother would be brought to account...and spending many awaking moment hoping she wouldn't go to jail! It was a kind of living nighmare, while she was alive! She died a few years back at 84 and I have developed my equallibrium, and i can live a much different life now. But, I miss my mother or I miss the mother that I wanted her to be! What I always considered a curse, has turned into a kind of blessing, though! No one would put themselves into my kind of situation in order to learn how it all works and that is what would be needed to figure ot all out! It is all good, now... still have 76 yr old sister, that has a story for another time...

@Dida the thing that we must face is that as adults, we are responsible for our recovery. We can't go back an undo the damage. What we can do is heal our broken places! And no one can do that for us...as no one else lives inside us! Healing, is exactly like an onion, it must be done one layer at a time...to do otherwise would not work because it would be catastrophic to our psyche (overload). And, I will share another discovery that I made in my very mentally ill family and other people that i have observed with mental problems. These people do love, but it cannot be expressed with nurturing and compassion or tender emotions. Instead of a loving expression being a support and strength...it appears as a weakness or vulnerability that exposes them to hurt (great hurt, not an everyday slight). My mother was sexual abused from age 5-13 by 3 stepbrothers and a natural brother. She tried to tell, but was not taken seriouly and protected but instead was beaten...had a still born birth at age 12 (most likely was blamed for her own abuse). Before, she passed, I ask her why she had not told us, her whole story and she said, 'because I thought that you would think that I was to blame.' My mother, could never show love, the kind that expresses tenderness and empathy and compassion...that would expose more vulnerability than she could EVER tolerate! (If no healing has taken place, it will remain so!) So, in my family we all stayed at a safe distance from one another!
That was my observation!

3

I love my Mom with all my heart, but she suffers from some very serious mental illnesses. Growing up I was the whipping boy, the target of her frustrations. I had to emancipate my self at 16 and move in with my amazing father full time while I finished school. She was abusive and neglectful of my brother and myself when we were children. I don't blame her though, she is just the victim of circumstance. I wish I could say that I am trying to reconnect with her, but that would be a lie. After 15 years of trying and failing I think it's an exercise in futility, much to my chagrin.

My older step sister also suffers from many of the same illnesses as my mother, though she has sought counseling and is doing rather well now and has a wonderful family. I'm very proud of her accomplishments and dedication to children.

Mental illness has been ever present in my life. I suffer from chronic depression, but I have learned to manage it without medication. I'm thankful that that's all I have to deal with considering my risk factors for much worse illnesses. I learned a long time ago that boundaries and empathy go a long way in helping loved ones cope with these kinds of issues, weather they like it or not. Sometimes you just have to separate your self from a toxic situation though.

I have problems with depression, anxiety and feelings of worthlessness, but mine pale in comparison to yours. It amazes me how some people get through such horrors. I take medication,and I'm also in therapy. I really admire people like you who managed to get through such terrible experiences, especially without medication.

I'm sorry to hear that you also suffer from mental illness. I have to admit that it can be difficult to manage at times without medication, but it is getting easier over time.

4

I cannot begin to imagine having to deal with such insanity. Although my parents divorced when I was around 11, and my mother subsequently married a real self-centered jerk, that was when I was a teen, and able to take care of myself. Otherwise, I've always thought of my childhood as idyllic. None of the craziness you describe. Sorry you had to go through all that.

3

I have a schizo brother who I am certain is an ice addict, my mother does everything for him including paying for hookers, he now has the family home while my mum is in a nursing home. Let's just say they are the only 2 people who have ever stabbed me.

@Dida Ice is Crystal methamphetamine it is doing the rounds big time over here at the moment

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