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Where do you draw the line?

What difference in age is a limitation for you in a relationship? 5 yrs/ 10 yrs/ more?

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By SadbDanae5
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50 comments

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7

I think as long as you care about one another and are healthy in your relationship, age shouldn't matter all that much.

6

Oops, I picked 5 years instead of 10. It's still early for me! As for the age thing I think, too, that it depends on the person and how I feel about them. If I loved them with everything I had to give then I'd have to go for it. Why not be happy?

6

No specific limit but maturity can be an issue as I discovered.

Skeptic66 Level 7 Nov 28, 2018
5

Generally speaking I'd like to date someone close to my age because we have more shared history. However, I think age is more of a mental state than a physical one. You can be young at 80 or old at 25.

Karob52 Level 3 Dec 3, 2018
5

Age is just a number to me. Maturity is a different story though.

Johnne0 Level 2 Dec 3, 2018
5

My first question is: Why does a line have to be drawn? That's an individual preference.

Speakeasy Level 4 Nov 30, 2018

For me a relationship is not about just two people. It’s about where you are in life.. professionally and personally. To date a person in thier 20’s who’s just starting out would be ridiculous. I’m well established and don’t desire to deal with someone’s mommy issues. Someone too much older may not understand that I have kids that come first. It’s a balancing act. One cannot be selfish.. maybe when I’m older.

To assume that some one much older may not understand the person younger who has kids that come first, from my perspective is false and it is a statement that would have to be demonstrated in every case to be at least most likely. This is funny in a way, because looking back at my family records, I learned that my grand father's second wife, was 40 years younger than he was and they got along as well as those couples that were comparatively the same ages. I'm not t trying to drag you across the threshold, but just to let you know that I'm having a hard time understanding your reasoning. If I'm wrong, I am capable of changing my mind.

And TC is asking what pur individual preferences are. I thought that was obvious.

5

Age doesn't matter as much as intentions and connection does. I feel I can relate better to someone closer in age since we are in a similar stage in life.

Jaed Level 5 Nov 28, 2018
5

Too big of an age difference and it is doubtful you will have that much in common.

snytiger6 Level 8 Nov 28, 2018
5

I say ten years -/+. I've tried going even younger, but it's too complicated.

kraseyk Level 6 Nov 28, 2018
5

Completely depends on the person. One of the happiest relationship I know, right now, he is 54, she is 76...she used to babysit him!

4

I don't draw the line....the line gets drawn at me ?

IamNobody Level 8 Nov 28, 2018

Ditto.

4

It would have to do with other things. Like if you dated someone 10 years younger how mature are they about relationships. If I get involved into a relationship I’m devoted all the way til the bitter end.

4

I have always considered 10 years the outer limit because someone that younger or older is just in a different place. I have always preferred age-appropriate relationships. Particularly when your partner is younger, you end up being a parent figure / mentor / baby-sitter and that's just too much.

In my previous marriage I was 5 years younger than my wife, and that worked out fine. That's the most experience I have though.

mordant Level 8 Nov 28, 2018
4

I can't vote because there's no upper limit for me, but for younger, I tend not to go for anyone under ~24 or so, so my range is -12 to positive infinity.

PolyWolf Level 7 Nov 28, 2018
4

I’m 48, I will not date anyone younger than 40. I prefer to date older, and will go about 10 years or so. It really depends on thier spirit.

3

I really do think it is totally ridiculous to judge any one by age differences except what is outside of our laws. I know personally one person who thought she would be better off being with some one her own age rather than the one she was with who was 7 years older than she was that became violent when he was drunk and beat the crap out of her when she nagged him about him being drunk. Well, she got her wish when she ran off with this guy her own age. To make a long story short. that younger guy her own age was an alcoholic, and when he got drunk, he would regularly beat the crap out of her. So, age is a very poor gauge by which to measure anything.

3

All my relationships just happened, there was never any issue of making a choice. Life sends what it does and you make the most of it if you can.

3

The only legal limit is adulthood. ...but obviously I have no clue about the newest musical groups or code words for joy in the newest and middle generations when I was 43 I dated a woman 66 the mother of a high school class mate....perhaps she chose me to learn code leading her son back to an empty nest ???? I will date a woman 91 in a heartbeat if she loves me and we take bubble baths together sing duets and LOBBY FOR PEACE through GREEN Jobs

3

Why should age difference matter? As long as they are two consenting adults, this matter is no body else's business. A stigma is always created by others who can't mind their own business.

Speakeasy Level 4 Nov 30, 2018
3

No limit for women older than me. A definite limit for the younger.

3

Age is irrelevant. In my relationships, I'm only interested in the way that our personalities work together. That being said, there probably isn't much that I would have in common with a 19yo, or a 60yo.

ScubaWags Level 6 Nov 28, 2018
3

Half plus seven. I'm 53. 26.5+7= 33.5. 33 is the youngest I'll go. 53-7=46; 46*2=92. 53 is half plus seven for 92 so that would be the upper limit.

Realistically I want someone who is in the same place in their life as I am. I'm looking to retire in another ten to fifteen years. If there is someone younger who is planning an early retirement or who perhaps has the ability to travel with me even though they are still working then that age is entirely appropriate and would be considered as a possible long term relationship for me. What I've found is that I have commonalities with people who are within 15 years of me. 38-68.

Nukdookum Level 8 Nov 28, 2018
3

I prefer older men, 10, 15, even 20 years older. However even 5 years younger makes me squeamish.

So 62 is perfect for you!

@Lop-Eared-Mule YES! Some of it depends upon looks and energy. I've met men in their late 40's that look like they're in their late 60s and vise versa.

3

I voted five. At my age, anymore would be creepy lol.

3

I said 5, but only because of how things have worked out so far. I don't have a problem with an age difference so much as I do a maturity level difference. I have usually been attracted more to men my age or older, but that doesn't mean all younger men are immature or that all older men aren't. So I wouldn't rule someone out based on age alone (outside of underage gents, which is a big NOPE from me) just like I wouldn't rule them out based on looks or health or a number of other things on there own merit. Yes, these things are measured and weighed, so to speak, but they are all just parts of a big picture and if I only kept my eye out for one I might not see the amazing work of art right in front of me that they create when put together.

Byrd Level 7 Nov 28, 2018
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