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More Dating Preferences

Ladies, do you prefer to meet your date somewhere, be picked up at home or pick him up? Why?

Crimson67 8 Feb 13

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Rule of thumb, meet them on neutral ground.. where there's people in a social setting. Not a good idea to have them come to your home or you go to there's. First off, one never knows who is going to show and what their agenda is. That really goes both ways.


I prefer to meet over an activity for the first meeting. Long walk somewhere nice. Stand up paddling on the lake. Indoor climbing. I never do a face to face coffee or drink first up! bad idea. Best to see what they are made of over an activity.


I've always been an adherent of the 'Meet for coffee, at a coffee shop, no expectations just chat' first meeting.


First date we meet in public and each provide our own transportation. No one gets my address until I'm ready to give it out. They often don't even get my last name til we meet in public, there's lots of weirdos out there.


In the beginning I like to meet somewhere. I like to know we both have our own rides and can leave if it doesn't go well.

I wouldn't want to bring anyone to my home or show them where I live until I know a little about them, especially since I have kids that live there. I went out on a bad date with once who started showing up at my work afterward and even brought his mom. It was awkward, but could have been worse if he knew where I lived.

MsAl Level 8 Feb 13, 2018

I would rather meet him in a public place if I have no other prior contact. If I know him from somewhere else it doesnt really matter


I know this was for the ladies. But I wanted to add my 1.5 cents. I never liked bringing someone to my place on a first date. I always get a little uncomfortable when she wants me to pick her up. It’s stupid possibly. But it’s more than just safety for me. If I pick her up, then I have that awkward ride to her place if the date doesn’t go well later. I also like to see tha she can take care of her self. I’m not interested in being.a sugar daddy. I’m not opposed to picking up the check. But a woman who drives herself is a good sign she’s not expecting anything more than just a fun outing with me.


I know the post was for the ladies but maybe this adds to the conversation?? I had a date where I met the woman at her house. Before I we finalized our plans I suggested we didn't meet there but she said she checked me out and personally knew some of my colleagues, even. So, she knew where I worked and who I associated with and she told all of her people we had a date. She had me dead to rights! And she knew it. So, if I was a perv, I'd either back out or behave for fear of her people taking me out! So, there may be a time where it's OK but I still think it's weird. We ended up having 2 dates but there wasn't any connection.


One can never be too safe. I like to meet them at the 'date' sight for several reasons. While I would like to be picked up at my place, but since I don't yet know the person, I don't want a potential stalker situation and I also want a comfortable drive home if the date doesn't work out. Now with that said, I did pick someone up from their place, since his car was not available to him on a short notice and we had a great time too!

Nena Level 6 Feb 13, 2018

And he trusted you not to be a stalker!

@FrayedBear Good (I met him on this site, felt it was a good enough filter for both.)


Meeting somewhere public of course.

I once had a guy try to invite himself over to my parents home (where I had just moved back). He didn't understand why it was a bad idea. Last I saw he's still extremely single 3 years later. What a shock. Rolling eyes


I'll echo what others have said about safety, but add I like to meet where ever it is we're going, so if the date goes sideways, I can escape. 🙂

It's sad to say (and luckily this only happened to me once) that some people drink too much and then think it's acceptable to drive. My date insisted she had a "high tolerance" for alcohol, but there is no way I would have gotten into a car with her.


If my date is male (previously, they all have been), and we met on a dating site, I would meet him somewhere public in my town for the first few dates.
Getting in the same car with someone is dangerous.

I once went on a date with the nephew of a nice lady at church, meeting him in a public place ,and during the date he was a perfect gentleman, so I accepted another date, to a movie, and foolishly agree to leave my car at his place and ride in his car to the movie.

When we got back, and I tried to leave, he tried to stop me, even tried to force himself on me. Since the guy was a 6'2" ex-marine, I didn't try my karate moves on him.
Instead, I remembered how men can only focus on one thing at a time and how they like to impress women, so I interrupted his attack by saying, as though I just thought of it.."Say, could you chip that ice off my windshield for me? I don't think I can."

He let go immediately and began working on my windshield. While he was doing it, I dove into my SUV and locked all the doors. When he finished, he tried to return to his amorous behavior, but I waved good-bye and drove off.

The next day I got a crazed stalker card from him, accusing me of "tricking" him and wasting his time on the date.
I replied that he had tried to force himself on me, and that I would call the police if he contacted me again

Wow, good thinking! I'm impressed. I want you as my wing lady!


Always meet somewhere neutral. I do not allow men near my home. I don't need them knowing where I live and being in my "space". I normally don't keep them around long enough for that privilege. Haven't met one yet that's worth more than a "love 'em and leave 'em" status. 😉


This is not only important for the ladies. This question actually fits for a gender-neutral approach.
I, being a guy, prefer to meet at a neutral location. If it works, it works, if not, than I don't need to know where she lives and she has than nothing to do with where I live. Not only for safety- but also psychological-reasons.

Gert Level 7 Feb 13, 2018

Yes men are not the only ones who can be stalkersfor sure.


I prefer to meet them at the place we are going to. That way if it goes bad I can just go home also so they won't know where I live so they can't stalk me.


Meet somewhere if it's close by.


I agree with everything said here.


For a first meet - definitely meet somewhere neutral. I don't consider it wise at all to share too much info initially. Once I know more about someone, then any of those choices are fine !


I prefer to meet somewhere. I don't care to have people in my space until I know them pretty well.

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