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Who are you actually?

Who is behind the mask that you show to the rest of the world? What is it you hide from us? Why?

Is it hard being the public you?

I’m bitchier, kinder, lazier, more mad, more sad, less optimistic, less brave, uglier.

(Bender, my favorite nontheist. ‘OhNoGod!&rsquo😉

Annaleda 8 Feb 15

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22 comments

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7

For the most part, what you see is what you get.
I'm not looking for approval from others anymore. Haven't for a long time.
It's nice to be liked, but I've learned I don't really need it.
I try to be kind and civil, but I'm not going to trip over myself to please anyone.

nice to be liked but even if a person tries to be liked it doesnt always work. In 2008 a bunch of stuff went south. I called that the F me stage of life. Lately I have been moving into the F them stage of life

I’m more comfortable being myself, and having very few friends, than stuffing myself into a box for others comfort.

7

Sorry, but with me what you see is petty much what you get. I'm too old to bother what people think of me anymore. The only thing that bothers me is that I come over as hostile when I'm not. "Better for knowing" probably describes me.

6

I am me and people hate it mostly

That’s how I feel. 🙂

brilliant you sound really cool

5

A few years ago, I came to a point where I truly love myself and now it really doesn't matter to me what other people may or may not be thinking of me. I am open and honest to and about myself in all areas of life. The way I figure it, if someone doesn't like who I am, it's their loss and I'm much better off without them. No mask. I'm a LOT happier than I ever was.

4

The older I get the more I'm just me. In my profession I know my strengths and my weaknesses. At this point I accept it and am not worried about trying to cover them up.

4

I go to some effort to show the world that I am unfeeling and am successful for the most part.
People underestimate all the time and although it sometimes bothers me, I continue the charade.
I am rarely serious and turn nearly everything into a joke. Most people think I'm funny or will tell me I'm not right while laughing.

I used to say that I would marry the first man, woman or ET that saw the real me.

I am not the least bit suicidal but i understand how comedians end up doing it. It is exhausting to always be the life of the party in public and yet spend most of your personal time alone.

I wouldn't have it any other way!

Admin, we REALLY need a sympathise button!

4

I didn't grow up learning how to craft a mask. I didn't know it was necessary or expected until I reached adulthood. (When you're ostracized and have next to no friends, you miss things.)

Now that I've seen how people respond to me being my fully authentic self--and, because it's completely unnecessary and foreign to me, I abhore the idea of wearing a mask--I don't like people and I don't want to be around them. It's crazy-making for me to think of what I'd have to do to be treated better...and realize that wouldn't stop all the crap. I can't deal.

I can't not be exactly who I am. So I don't go out much.

Admin, can we have "sympathise" buttons 'cos "like" don't fit right.

I feel this way too. Hugs.

4

I'm pretty much the same, but towards the outside world, i force myself to be more outgoing and friendly. Left to my own devices, and if i didn't force myself to be social, i'm actually more of a shy, introspective book worm.

3

I am experienced. Exceptional. Educated. Married. Retired. Opinionated. And a King of my castle. On my street and In my world, I am considered average.

3

The mask I wear is that of someone that is alive. My tolerances for life have been consumed by the void in which I stare. Time is forever my enemy till there is no more.

2

I put a fair amount of effort into being less judgmental publicly, but the nice thing about that is the practiced habit gradually becomes reality. The more I check myself, the less I need to.

I'm more depressed than people realize. It's manageable — no need to call a hotline on my behalf — but it manifests as lethargy, anxiety, self doubt, and a lack of interest.

I have a reputation for making over-the-line jokes, but that's just scratching the surface of the twisted thoughts swirling around in my head.

I resonate with you, my friend.

I can relate to that, too. =/

2

I am more gentle than I present.
I am less caring, though.
I lack many emotional responses and am quite content this way. I do not feel the need to display false emotions any longer.

I am usually happier than I appear, because my life has vastly improved in the last few years.

I’m glad for you. 🙂

@Annaleda thank you

2

no it isn't hard being the public me because the only difference is that I say less, that would cause offence and it doesn't cost me not to say it . I don't even think of it as a mask because i am not hiding anything from myself.

2

I am always ME. I am as constant in my mannerisms and actions as the west wind. Schisms and the like tend to become "norm" when people become "multi-faceted", so I am constant.

2

I am I and that scares me.

Ditto. Hugs

2

When I work? I am "Mr. Positivity" (sort of like Flanders on "Simpsons" ). When I talk (non-work stuff) it's good to hear about people's non-work lives.

2

I'm pretty much WYSIWYG and always have been.

2

Oh, I'm first! To comment. And what we really want to hide we will not tell here, will we? I am probably less sure of a number of things, less outspoken, more sad and tired and lethargic. But I am also no atheist, really. But I just find atheism a perfectly valid reaction to today's world. And atheists / agnostics more interesting to talk to than the hard core christians, who make me feel ill at ease. I feel the religious traditions don't quite do it ... for me anyway. And also, the God that most in this group here don't believe in, I don't believe in either. Is it hard being the public me? No. Much of my socializing hapens online.

1

My public mask hides how little I really care.

1

To be honest, I don't think I know.
In any dealings with people I feel I am fake because I don't understand people, and I don't understand me. I am fine in nature or just with animals, because "me" ceases to exist and I am simply part of the scene.

How I Became a Madman
You ask me how I became a madman. It happened thus: One day, long before many gods were born, I woke from a deep sleep and found all my masks were stolen—the seven masks I have fashioned and worn in seven lives—I ran maskless through the crowded streets shouting, “Thieves, thieves, the cursed thieves.”
Men and women laughed at me and some ran to their houses in fear of me.
And when I reached the market place, a youth standing on a house-top cried, “He is a madman.” I looked up to behold him; the sun kissed my own naked face for the first time. For the first time the sun kissed my own naked face and my soul was inflamed with love for the sun, and I wanted my masks no more. And as if in a trance I cried, “Blessed, blessed are the thieves who stole my masks.”
Thus I became a madman.
And I have found both freedom and safety in my madness; the freedom of loneliness and the safety from being understood, for those who understand us enslave something in us.
But let me not be too proud of my safety. Even a thief in a jail is safe from another thief. Gibran.

1

Dating right now in search of her answer to this question and my answer is transparent and consistent since I embraced Atheism 1965

0

I am an Open Book. I admit some chapters been removed and edited out awaiting the Special Edition Director's Cut. But that is Reserved for those Special People. In the Meanwhile... what you see is what you get. I am My Man... right or wrong. I behave as such. So every time day or night I go to sleep, my conscience is clear and without weigh. And if I told the truth, I don't have to remember what I said. I had lived a lot and planning on continuing to live a lot. I am just Re-Charging with little regrets.

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