I dated a guy who was living with thoroughly homophobic parents. He was in his thirties, back living with his parents after ending a previous same sex relationship. His parents knew he was gay, but they'd do anything they could to interfere with his chances of being a practising homosexual. He had to lie about where he was going and generally sneak around just to see me.

If your situation is anything like his, you're going to struggle to find or maintain a relationship while you're still in it. What are the options for living elsewhere?

It is possible to reconcile your Catholicism with your sexuality. I know people who've done it. I'm not entirely sure how, because I've never been in that position. There are gay Muslims who've managed to figure it out too, so it must be possible.

Many within the churches don't believe the doctrines being taught. They go out of habit, social reasons and in some cases sincere belief. Dont be hard on your self. Consider taking some deep breathes and focus on being centered and grounded at the same time seeking your own personal goals.

Leave home. Send resumes here to Virginia Beach, if you get a job you can crash with me for few months till you have enough saved to get your own apartment.

I think you will find the strength to find your own way. You've started already even if it's really difficult. I didn't have religion forced on me but was taken to church every Sunday, because that's what you did, and had a Catholic upbringing i.e. baptism, confirmation and schooling but was allowed to follow my own way. The Catholic church was very prominent on my dad's side especially, Grandfather was going to be a priest......but he met my Grandmother lol my uncle is still very active in his local church. But ultimately I made my own decisions and came to my own conclusions but I accept I had an environment to do so in. At least you've found this place, it could well be a valuable resource for support, good luck Nyssi

It might just do you a world of good to move out of your parents' home. Broaden your horizons, start getting out of your comfort zone. If you feel you could benefit from some therapy (most of us could/have), find one. That might also help with how you're feeling about your catholic upbringing. Good luck.

Sounds to me like you need to work harder at moving out of your parents place. I suffer from extremly debilitating chronic depression as well. It got so bad that I felt like I couldnt do anything and I stayed in bed for a month. I am in no way making light of your situation. I found it much easier to manage my mental illness after getting a better job and moving out of my religious parents house.

Stay strong and work at self improvement. It will astonish you the difference that it makes.

Being indoctrinated by and abused by a religion in the chain of abuse that includes parents is the rule, in varying degrees, for every major Patriarchal 'religion'. Pathogenic parents begin the abuse, somewhat unknowingly, long before a child experiences it's first encounter with the institution and that includes baptism. Humanity someday will come to recognize that abandoning religious institutions is not a turning away from a higher power, but a turning back to it and because of it. Life and love are both higher powers than fear and self-loathing. If one can escape as a self-preservation move and concentrate on repairing what is repairable, the original promise of life can still be largely realized. An escape calls for escaping all of it. The handlers and dogs will be out to retrieve you as surely as if you escaped a penal farm; all in loving 'concern' of course...

I think you need professional help. A lot here may give you good advice but may also give you bad one and we don't know enough of you to help you as you need help. We will be throwing meat balls to the wall to see what sticks. You deserve better.

Please tell me why you "still believe there is a higher power". What evidence, facts and data do you have to support that belief or is it just what you want to believe, in other words the old "faith" nonsense?

Be out and be proud in both your sexuality and in your non belief! Sounds like a lot of your depression would ease up if you moved out of your parents' house. At 26 you should be out anyway unless there's some disabling reason why you can't.
Also, believing you are forever a Catholic is somewhat like believing you can be cursed or blessed for that matter. This thinking subjugates you and holds you further down into depression. jmho

The higher power you believe in is yourself, That is the higher power we all own and own it fully.
You have been through some real soul searching and have faced some serious situations. Your parents are there because you choose to have them in your life. I realize jobs are scarce but so is your quality. You are brave having come to knowing who you are and accepting it. Now you must learn to cherish your specialness and get along out there You have that ability to love and be hapy