It takes a lot of guts to come out as an atheist. Being black, I imagine is harder to do so. I only say this as my son is half black, and that side of his family is very devout. The communities are that devout. He follows more in my footsteps, in more ways than one, but hasn’t ‘came out’ to them. It would be messy and hurt feelings flung about.

I thinks it’s hard for most of us on regular dating sites. I am up front that I am not religious, but steer away from the A words in the profile. I think that scares off some people, even the ones that are really religious themselves. You are more of a rare breed, I can’t tell you how many profiles of black men that I’ve viewed, that most always have phrases like, God fearing man or all glory to god. Then I know right off the bat, not to even bother. I’d would say be open to dating someone that is a believer, as long as it’s not a big part of their lives.

Not gonna lie to ya, it is a more difficult process meeting people as an atheist. Religious groups are an automatic social network, as long as you hold a membership card, you can meet all kinds of people.

Of course, atheists have their own social groups. I would recommend searching for your local chapter of freethinkers and carve out the time to sit down at their meetings.

I agree online dating has become fairly frustrating, but it's also the easiest way to find people you share ideals with. Don't give up, it may take a little longer, but you'll find someone.

Do you mean only black women, or does that include other races/mixed races?

Being upfront in your profile should limit responders to people sympathetic with your non-beliefs. There are sure to be black women who are sick of religion and being treated as second class citizens.

Welcome! And I know there are folks here who can give you way more tips on their experiences. I'm in New England so there are more of us Atheists.

Certainly you'll be able to at least meet people here. Good luck!

Do you know Mandisa Lateefah Thomas? She is president of the org Black Nonbelievers.

Chin up, I know it's hard but I also know you are not alone and the hero of many of us on this website happens to be a black atheist/agnostic and he is happily married with the requisite two children. Of course I speak of that brilliant astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson. I happen to know there are a lof of lady atheists here on this site, both black and white. But anyway, I hope you find someone special here.

I've been told by female friends that ratcheting down "atheist" to "not religious" or even "agnostic" or leaving the question answer blank (if possible) is a better policy. It's not dishonest, and for some the word "atheist" is taken as a challenge or a confrontation or a display of arrogance. (That's really unfair, but it is how some take it, fairly or not.)

Seems to me, though, that you're working in restaurants, so there's a lot of people in circulation. While I would be mindful of not crossing the line into sexual harassment, you should have a fair amount of interaction with people who can work setups. I've had better luck telling friends, "Hey, set me up with single women you know" than I had on dating sites.

Hey, @cheffers317 I'm going to take a couple of quick jabs at you here before I get serious. It bothers me a little when people appear to take shots at themselves. You know, the self limiting kind. So here comes the jab -- ready? I went to your profile and read what you had to say, then I blew up your picture -- twice. Here's what I see in the picture and what I get from what you've written.

First off, you're not Black. You are a rich shade of brown. Trust me, I know what you are getting at, but that's just my first little jab. Second, not only are you a fellow endowed with a delightful color, but you're one handsome, say, even a striking man. Now, let's add in what you said and I would venture to say you are quite likely a pretty articulate fellow to boot.

So, with that out of the way, we all know "dating sites" are problematic anyway, so I would suggest expecting much from any site is a stretch. You and I also know that being a chef is really restrictive of your free time, but it does give you an interesting calling card, doesn't it?

If you are interested in getting into a long term relationship (say permanent), these sites are not the prime source for that, though they can be. If that is not your interest, then sites like this one I suggest might be the better for the experience than others that are dedicated dating sites.

Your lack of religion is a sharp stick in the eye no matter where you are, though there are some places a little more "understanding" scattered around the country. So, I'm forced to ask, with the chef experience you now have, have you considered moving to some more friendly part of the country?

There are Atheist groups on Facebook that have black women.

Atheism ... race ... romance? Now that's a tough triad to pick apart! I'm compelled to ask, 'what would Morgan Freeman say?' In all seriousness, as a white guy, I'm almost immediately disqualified, however, I'd like to think that there are a good number of African-American women out there who admire and respect fellow atheists like Charlie Parker, Julian Bond and Ta-Nehisi Coates, and who, when it comes to religious belief, may not even really care about your beliefs, as much as they admire your cooking! Peace.

Welcome and may you find fun, happiness, joy and more in our little site, just be yourself.

It is hard to date religious people when you're an atheist. I thought I'd give it a try because where I live you really don't have a choice either but it always ended badly. It's possible that I'm unfairly blaming my inability to be in a serious relationship on religious differences instead of looking at other issues but yeah, it's definitely a factor. There is really no easy solution to the problem other than moving to San Francisco maybe? But hey, all you can do is have "faith" that you are not the only atheist in town. Our numbers are growing!

Ppl are always telling other's what THEIR problems are with them....hence, religion/god/spirituality, being the main thing ppl judge other's by instead of within

Well you could look for a sugar baby and have a contractual agreement instead of marriage. I am seriously considering that myself because women I meet all seem to only want money or a religious nutbar anyway...

Forget the dating web sites. Do the things that you like to do when you're not working and you'll be more likely to meet someone who shares your interests.

No tips. But when I read the title of the post... I was thinking something other than a physical characteristic.

Like a secret society, lol.

You might check out some local atheists organizations to at least expand your network. The American Atheists or FFRF or similar groups are likely to have local groups in most large cities. I feel for you. I am lucky in that my wife and I are both atheists. Pretty sure any close long-term relationship could not last between an atheist and deeply religious person. Pretending or going along by either side will not work. Worst case pretty drastic but move. There seems to be some areas with higher percentages of atheists like San Francisco, Seattle, Boston. Good luck and best wishes.

I could never understand how black folks could continue to believe a white man's religion that was stolen from Jews and Arabs. After how Blacks and Natives were treated, it just never made sense to me. I mean I get the brain washing but how does it not fall apart once they look around at the world.

I used to love dating black women but my atheism was a pretty big problem once they found out.

Online dating is a hard nut to crack, I think almost we anything use to describe ourselves could be a negative for some people.
A few years back I contacted a girl online, she had previously worked for me, and we got on well, I knew her ex back when he was her husband, we got on great. Apparently he was black, it is not an issue where I live so not something to take any notice of. She and I chatted online and she kept making comments about the type of guy she liked. I just didn't get it. I wasn't asking her out, we were just chatting, finally she told me, she only dates black guys. For my part if I see a religion on a profile, or words such as good christian values, God etc. I am outta there, never contact them. So it works both ways. I think you expect more from online dating than what it can do, it really isn't that great despite the apparently vast number of people there.

It is hard to date religious people when you're an atheist. I thought I'd give it a try because where I live you really don't have a choice either but it always ended badly. It's possible that I'm unfairly blaming my inability to be in a serious relationship on religious differences instead of looking at other issues but yeah, it's definitely a factor. There is really no easy solution to the problem other than moving to San Francisco maybe? But hey, all you can do is have "faith" that you are not the only atheist in town. Our numbers are growing!