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Strong desires?

So since I was fifteen, I’ve had a very strong interest in jazz and when I asked to be signed up, I was denied by my mom when she told me I wouldn’t be gifted enough to do it and that only certain people had the gift that I just didn’t have. I was hurt by the news, but was even more hurt when she said it was just a phase with me wanting to dance. I was still very young and was still finding myself and was looking for a nice hobby I would enjoy, but also get benefits from it health wise. Because I was so hurt by that response from her, I never attempted to even try because I just felt too stupid. Years later and that same compassion I have for this style of dance is still here. It’s gotten so overbearing lately that I don’t know what to do and it hasn’t gone away.

EmeraldJewel 7 Feb 28
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15 comments

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0

Sorry your mom is sooooo wrong about jazz musicians and dancers. ....the earlier a child picks up an instrument and masters scales and jazzes up any tunes the sooner a young jazz .musician can join a performing group....the "gifted" musicians are those who overcome great handicaps like dyslexia or poverty. ...as for dance following directions of a good teacher costs money your mom was too unwilling to spend for you. ....never too late to start for pure enjoyment

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Follow your passion. If you do you might regret it someday. If you don't you WILL regret it someday.

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What does your mom's opinion have to do with anything; you're 30, and no longer a dependent child, hopefully.

If you want to dance, just do it. Watch and learn from YouTube dance instruction videos, attend free ballroom group dances that also teach jitterbug, or if you are talking about tap dance jazz classes, or exhibition jazz dancing, you will have to pay more for actual classes.

I became an expert dancer in many genres when I was in my 40-late 50s, but after I moved to Thailand in 2010, I have only danced a few times.

Pic is of me and me ex swing dancing on the beach, Sand Key Island, FL (I designed and made the ballroom gown).

Nope! I’ve been on my own since I was 21, but the insecurities were still there lol.

0

Back in the 60's lol there was a cartoon character doctor feel good. His answer was "if it feels good do it".

1

Wow thats really unfortunate, im sorry too hear this, a parent should never say that to their kid at any point, especially early on when they are a toddler or in their teens, but I will encourage you pursue this dream and experience, you are never too old , music and also stuff like dance are like universal, Hey go for it!!

1

My family sucks at encouragement most of the time. I like the arts the most but they aren't the most profitable. But yet I love what I do and wouldn't change it.

2

Dance. Do do what you want when you want and ignore the opinions of others. As long as you are harming anybody be happy

1

See, when I was 6 my mom pulled me out of dance. I loved dance and tried really hard but my mom said "you just aren't good at it". It took me decades to realize that was the moment I stopped putting effort into anything. That one moment fucked me up for life. I always wanted to join taekwando growing up, but again "you're just so clumsy and awkward you wouldn't be good".

The thing I realized is, it shouldn't MATTER if you have a gift or talent or are good at anything as long as it makes you happy. At 27 I joined taekwando and yeah I suck at it, but I love it. My instructor and Dojang are so supportive and understanding and they don't care that I'll never be a third degree black belt, I'm just there because I've always loved martial arts.

So my suggestion is to join a dance studio. Find one that doesn't pressure for skill and talent but fun. Do what makes you happy, don't worry about how good you are at it. In the end, even if you're good at something, if you aren't enjoying yourself it isn't worth it.

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Hey just jump in the deep end girl , sign up =you know you want to do it - go for it! -- Parents don't always know best!

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Than start taking classes sis..feed that creative need..

Aww thank you.

2

I like soft jazz and a cup of java or tea. When younger I liked to swing.

Your mother did the best she could, and as everyone, she had personal dragons. I hate, love, pity my mother, who died long ago.

Go out and dance. Have a good time. Come online, here, and commune.

2

Start dancing! 🙂 if you can find a place that does other than the Texas two step !! Lol
Not that there is anything wrong with the two step...

4

I had a similar experience with my mom. In 4th grade we were learning about the judicial system. We had a mock trial and I thought being a lawyer was so cool. Came home from school and told her that's what I wanted to be when I grow up, her response was "only smart people can be lawyers." Ouch, hadn't occurred to me that I wasn't smart.

You should definitely see if there are any dance studios that offer classes!

@Shelton thanks. As I've grown and had children of my own I realize she did the best she could. She grew up in an abusive household and broke that cycle. So I'm grateful for that. I've made plenty of parenting mistakes myself...

Ouch! That would hurt. That was harsh.

4

It's never too late! Indulge your passion, follow your dreams! Google some local dance troupes, or go hang out in a local community theater.

5

Do it, woman. if my mother said that I would be more determined

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