And if you are not married but would like to be - why?
I ask this in a non-judgmental way. I am merely curious. In my experience, many of us are conditioned by society to believe it's necessary. As I've aged I've realized that isn't true for many of us.
Personally, I do not feel the need to get married. However, if I were to end up with a life partner who felt it was important, then we could go down to city hall and sign some paperwork. But by no means will I ever have a wedding!
I felt sort of like my mom expected me to get married after college. I married my ex 2 months after graduation. I was 22 and 20 when we met. He was 9 years older than me so we started a family right away. Raising kids is hard business. About 10 years in I realized how unhappy I was and that I was WAY too young to know what I wanted in a spouse. Took another 10 years before I finally divorced.
I genuinely hope my daughters wait longer than I did to get married and start a family. But....I’m also going to be an empty nester when I’m 45 so that is a big plus.
I am 99% sure I’ll never get married again. I’m also a bit cynical about love and if men actually have feelings so who knows, that could change.
The first time I was twenty four and I didn't know any better I suppose. The second time happened because I knew it was important to her, she wanted kids. So she got off the birth control and on to the prenatal vitamins and once she was pregnant, I asked her to marry me. The kids being the biggest reason to get married I suppose. Would I do it again? I don't think it brings anything to the table but if it was important to who I was with and if I'd decided that yeah, I'm planning on staying with this person then yeah, I'd do it again.
Weddings can be a sign of commitment (no snarky comments here!), legal/financial reasons or especially if one is going to start a family. "Marriage" can be/mean many things, but the legal commitment is usually just that, for the peace of mind of financial/familial security. What may not be needed for a couple may be important for a "family".
It was 1979, I was 17 with a baby and if the parents got married before a child was 6 months old, it could have the father's name. More than 6 months required adoption. I had 3 weeks to spare.
Second time, I gave into family pressure and married who everyone thought was a nice guy that would take care of me blah blah blah.
Not married but I'm in the same mind set as you. Mostly I think it would be nice to find a special someone who's weirdness compliments my own. Share private moments, do things together, but still be able to give each other space.
She was the “one”. . So elusive, but that partner exists.
I married more because it was looked down upon to have children out of wedlock. This is also because of religion in a way. I married a second time because I believed that I should not be a single father. With no love in the thought process it’s no wonder these things failed. I see no reason to marry again. We value connections. “When your with me be with me, when your with them, be with them”
On my first attempt, I thought I had found someone I could spend my life with. Won't make that mistake again
Rode that bike at 19. Found out 11 yrs later that it had no seat. I try not to speak in absolutes, nothing is certain except death and taxes. But, I don't aspire to be married again. And won't consider it until anyone can marry who they want, across the globe. Otherwise, the institution of marriage is meaningless.
I have never been married. I have dated but nothing really series. No kids in fact when I had to go through chemo (long story but if you want I’ll tell you.