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Why did you get married?

And if you are not married but would like to be - why?

I ask this in a non-judgmental way. I am merely curious. In my experience, many of us are conditioned by society to believe it's necessary. As I've aged I've realized that isn't true for many of us.

Personally, I do not feel the need to get married. However, if I were to end up with a life partner who felt it was important, then we could go down to city hall and sign some paperwork. But by no means will I ever have a wedding!

NicThePoet 7 Mar 4
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41 comments (26 - 41)

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1

Tax reasons would be the only reason I would not get the need to otherwise . Maybe it was my instincts or summit like that

1

I'm still asking myself that same question.

2

Not important. I want to be with someone. I don't need a contract.

1

I felt sort of like my mom expected me to get married after college. I married my ex 2 months after graduation. I was 22 and 20 when we met. He was 9 years older than me so we started a family right away. Raising kids is hard business. About 10 years in I realized how unhappy I was and that I was WAY too young to know what I wanted in a spouse. Took another 10 years before I finally divorced.

I genuinely hope my daughters wait longer than I did to get married and start a family. But....I’m also going to be an empty nester when I’m 45 so that is a big plus.

I am 99% sure I’ll never get married again. I’m also a bit cynical about love and if men actually have feelings so who knows, that could change.

6

I was drunk

3

The first time I was twenty four and I didn't know any better I suppose. The second time happened because I knew it was important to her, she wanted kids. So she got off the birth control and on to the prenatal vitamins and once she was pregnant, I asked her to marry me. The kids being the biggest reason to get married I suppose. Would I do it again? I don't think it brings anything to the table but if it was important to who I was with and if I'd decided that yeah, I'm planning on staying with this person then yeah, I'd do it again.

2

I was young, naive, and had low self-esteem.

0

Weddings can be a sign of commitment (no snarky comments here!), legal/financial reasons or especially if one is going to start a family. "Marriage" can be/mean many things, but the legal commitment is usually just that, for the peace of mind of financial/familial security. What may not be needed for a couple may be important for a "family".

1

It was 1979, I was 17 with a baby and if the parents got married before a child was 6 months old, it could have the father's name. More than 6 months required adoption. I had 3 weeks to spare.

Second time, I gave into family pressure and married who everyone thought was a nice guy that would take care of me blah blah blah.

1

Not married but I'm in the same mind set as you. Mostly I think it would be nice to find a special someone who's weirdness compliments my own. Share private moments, do things together, but still be able to give each other space.

1

She was the “one”. 🙂. So elusive, but that partner exists.

2

I married more because it was looked down upon to have children out of wedlock. This is also because of religion in a way. I married a second time because I believed that I should not be a single father. With no love in the thought process it’s no wonder these things failed. I see no reason to marry again. We value connections. “When your with me be with me, when your with them, be with them”

1

On my first attempt, I thought I had found someone I could spend my life with. Won't make that mistake again

2

Rode that bike at 19. Found out 11 yrs later that it had no seat. I try not to speak in absolutes, nothing is certain except death and taxes. But, I don't aspire to be married again. And won't consider it until anyone can marry who they want, across the globe. Otherwise, the institution of marriage is meaningless.

2

I have never been married. I have dated but nothing really series. No kids in fact when I had to go through chemo (long story but if you want I’ll tell you.

1

We had children and it seemed the right thing to do which was not the right reason going in so I was and am not surprised that it didn't work out. That being said the reason it didn't work wasn't quite what I imagined.

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