I never told my mother only because she would feel that it is her fault, and she failed somehow. She was very sick toward the end of her life and I did not want to add to her worries, but she would never abandon me or stop loving me. She always asked me why I do not go to church. I just told her that churches are full of hipocrytes and fakers looking for forgiveness on Sundays for the bad deeds that they do during the week. She just laughed and said yes, a lot of them are but there are good people also.

Being a family includes acceptance. I agree that your family either has to accept something about you or break that bond.

It is true whether the family accepts it or not. If they don't know about it now, it's inevitable that they will learn sooner or later. I'd rather be disowned than live a lie

One cannot lose family anymore than one can lose DNA.

My family were awful very abusive nothing to stop me being whatever I want left home at fifteen y.o carefree times don't regret it at all - My mother tried to take my daughter away from me whilst i was in hospital!

Yep.

I came out as an atheist when I was about 15. I was basically disowned by my family. However, I lived in a foster home anyway so it's not like I lost much in contact, but emotionally it was devastating. I spent 30 more years going in and out of my parent’s lives, and my two older brothers were horrible. I answered my door once, when I was around 22 and they threw what they said was holy water on me, as I was 'possessed by a demon'. Not until my dad died about 4 years ago did we start talking. I finally made connections with the second in line, my brother Jon, and he died 4 months later, my oldest sibling brother started to come around when at my brother Jon's funeral I spoke out about how I had been treated over the years and how much I felt cheated out of all the times the family had just shared about their lives with Jon the past 30 years... Still, although we sort of talk now, it is not the same, I am still the outcast. Our youngest is my sister and I have a fair relationship with her, but I will never be 'in the club' unless I submit, which I will not do...