It could be a phobia or something you dread on a visceral level, but what is the one thing you're most afraid of? I think for me, it's the idea of being destitute without any way out of that hole.
Know NO fear!
@twshield I really can't think of anything. It used to be being incapacitated and becoming a burden on my loved ones, but I have a plan in place for that now. I swear to you, I've let go of the fears that used to grip me. I finally figured out that what I used to fear was always worse in my head than it ever could be in reality. Even the unknown doesn't scare me. It's going to be whatever it's going to be. It doesn't make any sense to me to fear it. I deal with life as it comes.
Get old timers.. can't remember shit. Once the mind goes, it's over.
@SteveB exactly... that's what is so scary.. not remembering anything, even if you did forget it in the first place.
That I'm as awful a person as my insecurities tell me I am.
My body is eventually going to not allow me to lift. I dread that day.
Time to practice your, ahem, dread lifts.
@fauxname11 When some things go, like my supraspinatus, or there's too much arthritic damage in a joint I may not be able train around that injury. I may have to ignore whole bodyparts and watch as they atrophy away. Yeah I saw that video and she is damn impressive.
Going into a group primarily social by myself not knowing anyone.
I was procrastinating but I was encouraged by another person from this site to get out there and so I have been facing those fears. And its still awkward but easier each time. And I continue to receive support and encouragement from others here. Thanks, guys!
You are inspiring me. Both you and @kreig.
I HATE going into group settings by myself. But, I'm about 95% assuredly okay when I go into a restaurant or a movie by myself.
I bought myself and a co-worker tickets to see the Moth Grand Slam this Thursday night in New Orleans. Turns out she cannot go.
I've been wracking my brain vacillating between options, inviting this person or that person and who do I really want to experience this with. Will they even know what the Moth is? Will they appreciate it? What if they don't like it? Worse, what if I can tell while we're there that they don't like it?
Which all leads me to "Do I have the courage and self-confidence to go by myself?"
Arghghghghghghhhhh!!!
@BlueWave, I encourage, challenge you to go either by yourself or with someone (if they accept the invitation, it's not your problem if they don't enjoy it). My first Meetup didn't go well at all, very awkward but I decided to go again and each time since it's been easier. Do it! You won't be sorry. ?
Thanks, @BeeHappy . I'm not going to waste the money, so we'll see what happens.
I had my own motorcycle group on Meetup.com and that was surprisingly very easy for me. I think because it was mine and I was in control. I scheduled the meetups/rides and people came.
Walking into an event like this in particular where single people don't go is what is scaring me.
Still -- with regard to regular local Meetups -- I'm going to see what's out there. Just because of y'all.
Never finding the way I am suppose to help society.
I don't know that there's only one way. There are lots of ways to contribute. Do you do any volunteer work? Or advocate for any human rights causes? Or even just lend a helping hand when someone needs it?
@Nikonian I think it's entirely up to you how you contribute. In my case, my job takes up a lot of time and energy so I hadn't been too active in my community in recent years. But I decided I wouldn't ever have the time unless I made it a priority, so last fall I committed to training to be a volunteer mediator for the NYS unified court system. It's been a lot of work, and I'm still not certified with the state yet (three more co-mediations to go), but it's been a rewarding process and I expect to have many interesting cases in the coming months and years while helping people resolve their conflicts (e.g., magistrate cases, parental custody and visitation, child support).
Turbulences on a flight.
Had that over the middle of the Pacific. No thanks.
Mine too.
I fly.
And In those moments, been so conditioned to say, oh god, that I had to reassess my possible end of life phrase, a cuss word is more apt.
But then...The same applies to seeing a beautiful woman and there i am at a loss, mumbling, stuttering suffices to say the least.
My insecurities are on my looks.
My dear, you are an attractive and desirable woman.
@jlynn37 Okay. Thanks. I mentioned this in my bullying post.
My worst fear has been realized. Nothing else remains.
That's terribly sad, though I guess surviving your deepest fear has its merits, too. I hope you're okay.
@resserts it’s really done nothing but destroy me. It has dawned on me since, that fear is directly correlated to the value you place on your life. At least that seems to be the case.
Well, I've fallen into destitution just recently at least for 24 hours of the unknown.
I'm a scrapper so I know I will survive. I'm not necessarily worried about companionship as I am about just becoming invisible. Alone in such a way that its solitude.
I'm getting back on my feet as we speak, thank you.
Dying a slow horrible death and my dogs getting treated like shit after I die
The latter is a real thing. Not to get too soap boxy but a neighbor's mom was hit and killed by a car while walking her sheltie. They were not the best to that dog after her passing. Shelties bark, a LOT, they put a manual (not automatic stim which graduated settings) on her dog to control it, they zapped the dog all day before winding up taking it to the pound, her beloved dog.
This would not have happened if she'd had a contract , a right of first refusal from a good breeder to insure her dog would be returned safely and properly rehomed.
yes, it is, I love my dogs more than anything including myself, id rather they were put to sleep than go through a load of pain and hurt. it's the reason I've gone from 6 dogs to two dogs, to be honest. I still think dying a long slow death is a very real thing too by the way.
Intractable pain and disability.
I have already been there; it scares me to see the person I became when those two conditions hit me.
Being forgotten, abandoned, and alone
Yup that's me
Being trapped in my own mind/body in such a way that I was completely dependant on someone else. And unable to choose to end my own life.
Yeah that's pretty fucking frightening.
Being old, broke, and lonely.
Serious concerns, for sure. I'm quite introverted, which seems fine now, but I'm unsure what that will mean for me once I'm elderly, can't get around well, and have fewer and fewer outlets for occasional socialization.
I'm conflicted. Phobias and visceral fears aren't silly or fun. But, I'll play. I have two fears. First, that we are dead humans walking because of climate change. Second, I fear the US will become another Nazi state with a paranoid dictator in charge.
Perhaps not silly or fun, but somewhat random. I suppose it could have been filed under health & happiness? Dunno. I didn't really care about the category so much as the topic itself.
Fire. WhenI was five years old my mother threw a spray can of paint into the incinerator. Kaboom! My whole back yard of 10 acres of field was on fire and it spread down the fields of our neighbors. Every fire engine in town must have made an appearance. Luckily it didn't reach anyone's house. I can't light a match, lighter and get nervous around bonfires to this day.
The only fear or insecurity I can think of that I have is that something bad happens to the people I care about. Also, probably not realizing my full potential to do something better in life. Whatever that means.