To me they're two separate things: a first meeting, and/or a first date. A first date would be more customized and involved, whereas I usually plan a first meeting at somewhere innocuous yet open, such as a coffee/tea shop, where it can be as brief or as long as we're inclined.

A light meal downtown followed by a walk (in a well lit, safe, public area) and maybe an after dinner coffee/tea and dessert at a cozy cafe sounds good.

Actually, an afternoon/evening spent fising from the local pier or bridge, including a picnic that we brought along sounds sort of fun. Maybe not as the very first date, but an early one.

Successful first dates mostly depend on with whom, of course. That said, the date needs to be socially safe/public and not too intimate or isolating, while allowing oodles of time to talk and get to know each other. There is an optimal balance between too cozy as to be awkward and too distant to allow any meaningful interaction. Short/casual enough to allow a graceful escape, but easily extendable if things go real well is also ideal.

I cannot recall for the life of me what my late husband's and my first date was, but recall extending and extending to keep the conversation going. Neither of us wanted to it to end, even after watching the sun come back up. (:

Live music, wth snacks, karaoke so I can sing, walking, bowling, something where there is a purpose other than meeting up.......

In most of the experiences I've had the women are very hesitant, and want an easy escape. They opt for coffee/tea. Most of the time they're ready to leave within 10 minutes, so that makes sense to me.

Getting a meal together is my best one. Nothing expensive, a low end restaurant or fast food place is my go-to. Over the course of that meal we chat and either vibe and get to know one another, or we just finish our meals and go our separate ways.

For an ice-breaker meet and greet, I like to take a walk in a picturesque place outdoors, along a scenic path, a garden or arboretum. A stroll that takes an hour or so, maybe somewhere I'm already familiar with. That way conversation can be easy, and any silent moments can just be filled by enjoying the scenery.

If the hour goes well, then perhaps a picnic or cool beverages could be pre-packed in a cooler to enjoy at the park or beach, but not mentioned or promised in advance, in case it doesn't go well.

Or if the weather isn't conducive for a walk outdoors, then coffee or tea is a great idea, and if all goes well then just continue on to a museum or some activity from a list of options thought about in advance, just in case. Those are my thoughts.

Where I live, nearly all the "first dates" chosen by men seem to be snorkeling or some way to see the gal in a bikini right off, which causes a lot of anxiety by putting too much judgment on body weight and skin tone, when the real point of the date should be to gauge social compatibility, and emotional or intellectual stimulation, not just sexuality, in my opinion.

Sex. It's such an ice breaker.

bowling and