When my ex-wife calls me because she can't get a boyfriend. I tell I'm in the past tense.

I hate that too. I thought I was the only one with that issue? I've never mentioned it to people, because most of the time I get called crazy. I have a horrible habit of not looking before sitting down on the toilet in public restrooms. At my work we don't have the liners, and most of the women customers squat and piss all over the seat without cleaning it up. Then I'm told to hurry and use the bathroom when I ask to go quickly, and I never look to see if there is piss all over the seat. I move really fast and I find out someone pissed on the seat when I stand up. One day a woman pissed all over the seat and all over the floor! I had to bleach it all and mop it up before we opened the store. I guess the night crew didn't clean the women's bathroom at all. My boss found it in the morning.

That for as friendly as people generally are in Indiana, they magically turn into assholes when they get in their cars. No one here but me will let you merge, and the wave of thanks is a rarity.

The news

Flossing. I say this only to share this standup comedy video clip: [cc.com]

Being interrupted when I'm trying to speak. It's rude and inconsiderate. I've smoked too much weed in my life, my short term memory is shot. I'm lucky ? to be able to finish a thought when I'm able to speak straight through what I'm attempting to explain, when I'm interrupted, forget about it smh ?‍ ?

Getting up.

having to stick my hand in the garbage disposal

I've got a touch of microphobe and bring a little bottle of 90%isoprohyl everywhere with me. I spray toilet seats before laying paper down even. LOL

That's why I got good at hovering !

My cringe-worthy event ? Other people's driving.

The fact that assholes are everywhere.

All the men in my family served in the Navy. On board ship, there's never a ' cool stool'.

You had to go there@##%^

Being the one who's job it is to clean the seat where all of the unknown cheek's have been.

Someone blowing cigarette smoke near me and they are coughing and hacking away.

Herr Drumpf..