I'm quite glad, I'm not participating in this anymore.
I posted this because I thought it was probably a good example of young people of both sexes that really wanted to meet each other but didn't know how to go about it.
I love to dance and I used to go to an old folks dancehall where nobody smoked and there were lots of singles.I started going there with a older couple that met there and needed someone to drive them at night. I found it to be a lot of fun but I really think at that time I was only going to dance. I eventually did meet a guy and dated him for a few months but like many guys his age he was determined not only to tell me what to do but what to think. He was evidently considered the best catch of the club and he was better looking than most and a very good dancer. After we parted company I decided it was just too far to go to dance plus I started dating a local guy who really wasn't a very good dancer.
I think the point of this story is that every person that I've ended up dating since my husband died was not met on a dating site or a club crawl. I met both of them doing something that I liked to do. Besides I wasn't all uptight and worried about impressions when I met them and neither were they except maybe the dancehall guy.
Pretty on the mark. I haven't visited dance clubs or the bar scene with the intent of meeting women since I was in my 20s and even then it was pretty demoralizing, even tho I was noticeable better looking with a full head of hair and an athletic body. Since then I have only entered bars to sing karaoke or listen to live music. The dance club and meat market bar scene are a ridiculous waste of time for people once they are middle aged or older. I did go to one of them just out of morbid curiosity after a woman at a singles group for older adults that I briefly attended said that she went to this one club to meet men and dance. So I gave it an hour one night and it was exactly like this nature video. Really loud music, very packed, nowhere to sit, lots of women dancing together just like in the video amusing themselves with the advances of guys approaching them. Total bullshit. Nobody knows or can tell who there is actually interested in meeting other singles, who is there just to dance with their female friends, who is there mainly to chase sex (undoubtedly a minority of the women, but probably most of the single men) or who is maybe more than one of the above.
And it's not worth any man's time or money to hang out there futilely trying to figure it out. Dating sites, cesspools that they are, are much better because at least most of the people on there-excluding the scammers and fake profiles-are at least nominally interested in meeting people to date. I have run across a number of women who say they refuse to use dating sites to meet men, because they say they can do that just as easily for no money by going to bars and dance clubs instead. And that may be true for the women who are above average looking, since there will always be men at those places who will buy them drinks, etc. and I saw evidence of that when I did my one hour field trip to the dance club. But the woman, no matter what her looks, will still have to pay their own cover charge if there is one for the club, and few men are going to approach a woman who is below average looking compared to the other women at the club. I also noted that the women I've run across in the last few years who say they will do clubs and bars before using dating sites, are NOT blessed with the kind of looks that will get them lots of free drinks, but I managed to refrain from my usual nature and tell them they would be paying their own way at the bars and clubs if they choose that route over dating sites.
Bottom line is, if you are male at all, or a below average looking female, you are going to have to spend some money to meet dating prospects at my age. The choice is spending money on a dating site or else at the bars and clubs. In my mind, if I'm going to try meeting female strangers at public events, then I'm going to spend my money on live music events, since I will at least get some entertainment and enjoyment from the music even if I don't meet any single women. And I will also know going in that these women at least share my taste in music and are less likely to be big fans of country music, which I can't stand.
Happy fucking Valentine's Day, fellow singles...
I'm glad that I'm no longer in the mating game. I go out in a mixed gender group bubble once or twice a week - and we dance as a group, individually and spaced out.
Lately I've been getting approached from single (strangers) guys and girls who ask me to dance, but I don't want to introduce anyone new to my social safety bubble. I usually first try avoiding eye contact when I can sense them making their move toward me, and then I politely rebuff them after they ask me to dance. I'm usually already dancing anyway, so I just invite them to join the group and admit that I prefer to dance by myself during covid.
I like dancing with my group/table for safety and moral support. I've got girlfrends and guyfriends who can come to my rescue if I get unwanted attention that I can't fend off. They would be shocked if I ever actually wanted attention, since I'm pretty picky with who I share my time, but I guess it could happen! I'm just glad to have the time and opportunity to go to the outdoor dance spots here locally. Not looking to pick anyone up when I go out.