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PORN (straight)
At the risk of offending some or many, what is your opinion on the existence and use of porn? I find the way women are usually treated in porn reprehensible but I definitely can't say I've never used porn. Can you use porn without supporting the underlying misogyny? What kind do you use and why? I know a lot of my posts have been about sex but that's where my head is at right now. (It's been a rillllllly long time...)

kmdskit3 8 Dec 1
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13 comments

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1

Personally, I am glad to hear that you find the way women are (usually) treated in porn to be reprehensible. It is. If you just randomly google "porn" most of the links you will get will be to films that degrade, and even harm, women. Porn has become a huge global industry in my lifetime, and the results are anything but encouraging. It is an industry that is built on false promises, and women's pain. Porn has exploded into many ugly subgenera, catering to the lowest of human appetites. Most young women getting into commercial porn nowadays do not last more than 6 months, because of the ways their bodies are abused; double-anal, for example. And many regret it, but their images remain on the internet indefinitely.They are not as well-paid as porn fans would like to believe, and the industry just chews them up and spits them out. Porn consumption is especially bad for children, because it teaches them harmful things about how partners should be treated during sex. Teen Vogue recently published an article instructing teen girls on anal sex; we have porn to thank for this. And porn overuse is leading to an epidemic of erectile dysfunction in young men; something the medical field has never seen before. Perhaps the worst consequence of porn use is the effects on intimacy.
It doesn't surprise me that so few women are commenting on this thread. Many women who don't like porn have learned not to say so, because men will call them prudes. Women who do like porn don't generally advertise the fact: little good is likely to come of it. Porn is anti-love, and anti-intimacy. I personally don't believe you can use porn without supporting the underlying misogyny.
The good news is: if you avoid porn, real live women will be more appealing to you, and you to them. And for the record, I have lived a polyamorous lifestyle for most of my life, have had many lovers and sexual experiences, have danced topless, and enjoy erotic art.

I'd be curious to hear your perspective on another of my posts 'The Male Gaze' .

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I understand your worries, therefore, when I watch real porn I try to find female directed porn or porn that shows women in a positive light - ethicalporn.com has a great selection. I also would recommend supporting camgirls who often show pornographic content during their streams and some do their own amateur porn videos; most camgirls are working consensually and find their work empowering as well.

Thank you for the very helpful suggestions.

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I do use porn, yet I generally find it ridiculous and I am well aware that it has little in common with what normally happens in private. At least not with my vision of it.
As treatment of women in porn - they agreed to it and were paid for the job so it is not like they are being raped or somrthing, yet the improper treatment of a person on screen really diminishes the appeal of the product to me personally.

1

Some porn is genuinely degrading, but there's plenty of porn where the directors and performers involved have no regrets and love every moment of it. Especially if it's femdom.

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the woman and men in porn are there by choice be it money, loving sex or both. I like to look for people who are either fucking good actors or more importantly real sex. I hate fake liking things and I really hate fake tits. I tend to watch the homemade really but some porn woman really seems to enjoy it. sometimes I watch seans and I can just tell they're doing it because it's in the script. I hate stupid storylines or even worse when they get porn stars to pretend they're just jo public. I'm really highly sexed and single so why not. I hate stigma around sex. if you aren't hurting anyone and you both like it get it on.

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Where are the comments from women? My first wife used to bring films home for us to watch.

2

I figure porn is a performance and not to be mistaken for reality, any more than soap operas teach us about successful relationship habits or "Office Space" informs us on workplace decorum or Grand Theft Auto should be used for drivers education. With that said, I get what you're saying: do a web search for "ethical porn" and you should find some good resources.

Not a bad idea.

0

Pornhub has a category for women friendly porn. Some of it is straight and some is lesbian. The straight is more about foreplay and ultimately pleasuring the woman. Yeah, sorry, I'm still not convinced the orgasms are real. It certainly isn't the usual wham-bam stuff.

CS60 Level 7 Dec 1, 2017
2

I have watched porn, and usually find it to be pretty boring. I tend to favor well constructed plots and good dialogue.

I think exploitation of anyone regardless of gender is simply wrong. I think actors shoudl be entitled to residuals and shares of the profits.If that could be achieved then my opinion is that it is an honest way to make money.

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Frankly, that's why I much prefer amateur or synthetic (created by artists through art) to anything produced to be strictly commercial.

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I have a saying... There are two types of men in the world: Those who watch porn, and those who deny they watch porn.

As a gay man, porn is a completely different animal (pun recognized). I've had girl friends ask me when they found out their significant others were watching porn about how I felt about it.

Whereas the first question you'll hear in my hood when guys hook up is: "So, what kinda porn ya got?"

2

I see what you mean about the underlying misogyny in porn, but the women who star in it are doing so of their own volition and I think the percentage of men vs. women that watch it are not as far apart as many would think.

4

Considering the current situation in Hollywood, can you watch anything without supporting the underlying misogyny? Personally, I know a few strippers and they feel empowered by their jobs and assure me that's how most of them feel, so I assume pornstars probably feel the same. Regardless of what they portray on film, it's ultimately a consensual system. Filmed rape is evidence, not porn. I think as we open up a more level playing field and change the way we see women in real life and how our kids will, what we find sexy will shift and porn will react to accommodate and the portrayed situations will be less misogynistic.

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