I would never waste my time on a Trumper, once I knew their politics. As for general rules on dating, I usually settle for or initiate a hug at the end of the first in person meeting, which is usually for coffee. I offer to walk them out to their car and do the hug there, if they are comfortable with it. The man should try to read the woman before that moment for what they seem to be up for or wanting. I know from my point of view, it's really great and helpful if the woman gives some signal about wanting a hug by opening their arms towards me at that time to make it clear they are interested in a hug. I rarely attempt a kiss at the goodbye unless the woman has really been putting out some signals that they are attracted to me, like playing with their hair, looking intently and warmly into my eyes, moving closer across the table, etc.

I always meet first for coffee, like I said, and I always offer to pay for it, but if the woman insists on paying for hers, I respect that and let her do so. I don't believe in any of that stuff about a woman "owing" a man anything, whether it's sex, a hug, or a kiss for buying her anything, whether that is a coffee or a meal. But I do avoid meeting first for a meal instead of coffee, because I have learned from experience there are plenty of selfish, cynical women out there who agree to meet a man for a meal, just so they can enjoy the ego trip of getting a free meal and playing a game on him of never seeing him again or savoring his one-sided interest in them while for her the man is just a meal ticket and ego stroke of being wanted and not giving him sex, as he expected, in payment for the meal. I even had a former massage therapist, who I dropped after finding out she was a Trumper, that confided in me how she would play this game for free meals a lot when she was younger and single.

Online dating is a jungle out there, Lonnie, and I am on Match now, just like you. I wish you the best and your best is all you can do. So much of it is pure luck and beating the very uphill odds of meeting someone compatible who is smart and offbeat enough to choose you over all the competition that is there on paid dating sites like Match. For what's worth, even tho you are several years older than me, if you lived in my area, I would be eager to meet you.