Agnostic.com

13 13

Online dating is dysfunctional. It's online shopping.

Two days ago, I sent this message to Brad, 61, on Fitness Singles:

Love your photos! Each one tells a story. Got a kick out of the picture of you facing a shimmering waterfall and casting. Next: "Look what I caught!" with an adorable grin. Priceless.

You must be a whiz at marketing. Every picture tells a story, whether intended or not. Your photos all tell a story about you. Well done.

I sent a link to your profile to a man who wants to meet me at a super-spreader location. Want him to see your great photos. "I refuse to play Russian Roulette with my health," I told him. "I'll pass." Plus he lives 360 miles away. Too far. I gave him this advice:

"You posted eight photos of your face from the chin up. As a group, your photos look like a sea of white bowling balls. You have the bad habit of severely cropping your pictures. Also your weird main photo looks like you are naked in a classroom. It's jarring.

"Instead you need to post recent photos taken outdoors, doing activities you enjoy and would enjoy doing with a woman. Ditch the sunglasses. Women want to see your eyes and smile. With online dating, your photos and profile are an advertisement to attract the kind of woman you want to date."

He thanked me for the advice. You guessed it. I was a successful marketing director. Your thoughts? Kathleen

Brad's reply:

Hi Kathleen,

I love your photos too. They are really, really good -that is, they project your outgoing and affectionate (and romantic 😘) personality. I love that. I am also amused that you used mine to coach another guy....

I can see that you get out on the trail a lot. Any kayaking in your outdoor routine?

I could go on and on about the dysfunction inherent in online dating. It really isn’t dating. Rather, it is online shopping, and as you said above, marketing ourselves to shoppers.

It is at least refreshing to an authentic “shopper” like you that communicates in an accurate, engaging and affectionate way. So much of this is just people screening (like an HR screening interview over the phone or online) with lots of questions but not offering much on their end. Brad

Brad sent me his phone number. We will talk this weekend. Lalala.

These are photos from Brad's profile that attracted me.

LiterateHiker 9 Aug 19
Share

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

13 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

1

Good Luck Kathleen !

twill Level 7 Aug 31, 2021
3

My lady picked me out on a fetish website we were members of and messaged me, based mostly on what I wrote in my profile and my other writing rather than the pictures.... so obviously, that experience won't have a wide application for everyone. Although I understand a lot of ladies like a burly chest, so....?

1

Good luck.

1

Good luck! You've worked hard and it's got to pay off sometime, or so it would be nice to see.

1

Good luck!

1

Good luck, hon! You are due for some good fortune. 😉

@zeuser

Thank you very much!

1

It's a jungle out there. I recently was compelled to give money to the new girl at work. I'm a good judge of character and I never loan money to anyone. She needed this to get her driver's license and to buy some Mucinex. I really felt for her and within 4 days I got my money back. She said her new bank card had come through. She's a wonderful person, enjoyable to talk to, rumored to have a boyfriend, and they live with her sister and her husband. She is always doing things and loves playing with children. The thing is, there will most likely not ever be an "us" as much as I would like for there to be.

Good luck with Brad.

2

Good luck with Brad!

3

Brad seems to have adopted all the recommendations you've made to me:

  • Find someone else to take pictures of you doing things
  • Be good looking
  • Be successful
  • Have good genes

Let us know how much of this was marketing.

Good luck with jeans?

2

He does look and sound about as real as it gets, Kathleen! And he has kind eyes. Best of luck, pls let us know how the call goes 🥰.

2

good luck.

2

I gave up on that

bobwjr Level 10 Aug 19, 2021
5

i bet he's got a rash or something.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:616944
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.