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LINK Ted Cruz: Americans Have No Right To Masturbate

Listen up, boys and girls. Eduardo has an important message.

HippieChick58 9 Apr 23
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44 comments

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3

Guess I'm not an American, then.

11

I'm actually glad to know I personally offend the man. Regularly.

Hahaha!! That makes two of us.

hahahaha This! 😀
I'm sure he has a Facebook page. I feel like going there and posting "I masturbate in your general direction!" bwahahaha

Touché ?

LOL

10

Cruz is such a moron. I sincerely hope he loses his Senate seat to Beto O'Rourke in November.

We should all donate to his challenger...

10

I am surprised trumpie has not found a position for him as he fits right in with the dumbest people he has given jobs to.

10

This is what turns people off to you, Ted! How dare you dictate what goes on behind closed door. Privacy is a fundamental right in the United States.

Besides, you're a fucking hypocrite:

ballou Level 8 Apr 23, 2018

Hahhahahahhaahaha

???

Hahaha. I haven't verified the statement, but the tweet is real.
[twitter.com]

9

Always wondered what his problem...it is so much clearer now.

So profound!

9

His college roommate [huffingtonpost.com]

"But he took his ridicule of his former roomie to new levels early Tuesday morning when he invited people to imagine Cruz masturbating “four feet below you in the bottom bunk bed.”"

What a classy way to call someone a wanker.

Ohhhhh, no, image burned into my brain!

9

That guy makes my skin crawl every time I see him.
His weaseliness is right on par with Paul Ryan's.

PS. I believe "weaseliness" should be a real word.

I agree, and TC does it as much as PR. We can add weaseliness to the dictionary.

It is a real word now.

I'm so proud! I birthed a new word! 😉

@Paul628 I vote to accept the word into our vocabulary.

Just a PSA, every word anyone's ever spoken, cept maybe "mama" or "ouch" was invented by someone. If others understand your meaning, it's a frickin' word!
English grammar nerds, notwithstanding!

@njoy_life_2 In that case. Weaseliness©

?

9

Sigh. And he represents me in the Senate. I see this had to do with dildos. So, as long as there is nothing mechanical involved, I'm in the clear?

My condolences - having him as your senator! You have my permission to do anything you want with your body! (My permission has as much weight as his prohibition!)

8

He sure loves tities apparently....

8

Hasn't this dope been raptured yet? (sigh)

8

I ,for one, refuse to take life advice from the Zodiac killer.

7

He should keep his nose the hell out of my pants and everybody elses too. He's just the catholic church trying to gain total control over everyone and everything. All the catholic church wants is total world domination. Make prostitution legal (it is in the bible) and easy access to birth control and he won't he to worry about people masturbating near as much. Medically speaking masturbation is actually healthy, espically for men. For men, the more time the pipes are cleaned the healthier the prostate later in life. Which raises the next question-why don't priests have all kinds of prostate problems?

@EricJones... Why priests don't have prostate problems??? Because they DO keep the pipes clean !!! See, your question is rhetorical ?

@IamNobody @EricJones I think priests may be getting more "pipe cleaning" than the general population. Of course that is not for public attention.

@HippieChick58 They are. And even thinking about any form of sex is a sin for everybody but the clergy. That's why nuns are always smiling and walking funny.

Regarding the priests, one word answer: Alter-boys!

7

People need to start sending him dildos by the truckload.

The 2014 Bundy standoff was swarmed with dildo care packages and candy dicks

7

Don't worry; he is a USA Naturalized citizen....born in Canada to an American woman who had him AFTER SHE HAD CHANGED HER NATIONALITY TO CANADIAN..........and she did so at the moment her Cuba born husband became Canadian.

IAW, Ted Cruz's mother wasn't American at the moment of his birth.

Ted Cruz can't be president.

but we still don't want him back in Canada either!! wink!

@Lukian Surprises me not. Since he is now a USA citizen he won't be back there.

7

Ted Cruz knows full well what the law is on this matter. The fact that he is pushing this shows what a dangerous theocrat he is. Period dot.

7

The real question isnt' whether or nto peopel have the right to masturbate, but whether or nto the goerment has the right to try to prevent it. Legal precedent states that the state (government) has to show a valid copelling State interest for wantign to limit personal freedoms. That is the law in the U.S. You would think that Ted Criz, as a lawyer would know that. That he doesnt' really makes me doubt his qualifications. I mean, I am a layman, and I know it. Granted i did take soem courses in contract law when in colege, thinking I might want to go to law school, but he supposedly finished law school, but doesn't really seem to understand the law.

And then how in the hell are you going to enforce it? It would be a waste of time and paper to pass such a law.

@HippieChick58 Yeah, such a law would be unenforceable.

7

Well damn, Mr.Zodiac killer. I guess just what I needed is a duller life. It's not like this is the only life I'll have or anything.

7

lol! Oh imagine what this protest is gonna be like! They'll be hosing off the Capitol steps for a week!

6

Pretty bad when you won't even touch your own dick. Why would anybody else?

6

If he really said this, its nonsense. its totally natural to do this, and if not would probably raise tensions mostly in males but females too. After the debates, im not sure who takes this guy seriously anyway.

6

Ted. What a joke!!! I can't stand to look at his face.

by the time one finish looking at his nose his face is gone.........lol

6

Trying to start something that he can tag his own... winning that vote and getting that support. Hes a dumb ass.

5

This reminds of : [m.imgur.com]

Yet another reason to be agnostic/atheist.

Ohub Level 7 Apr 23, 2018
5

Cloning?

5

Ted Cruz is an imposter! He's really Ed Grimley!

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