There are enough choices and ideas out there to satisfy almost everyone. I think a person should decide what they want and then make sure their partner or partners or the sex toy in your drawer are all in agreement

People get hung up on convention & blindly following the norms. It's nice thumbing my nose at all of that and finally being able to evolve 'me' in peace. Love poly & open.

When you commit, you tend to do everything to achieve something. Love is some sort of a commitment which is not written or signed in paper. When you break your commitment, that invisible paper gets lost, and it's hard to bring the trust back. We have only 24 hours a day, out of those you sleep and do chores more than half, then work, then may be children, then may be pastime, so where does a productive man or woman get time to deal with multiple partners in a loving way. If you are hooking up or cheating because you don't feel the love for your current partner, then sooner or letter someone will break someone's heart. There's no absolute right and wrong.. when you love someone, you eventually know what will break their heart, and if you intentionally break heart anyway and bring sadness, are you wrong? It's up to what you define compassion for yourself. But I am a fan of free and unconditional love. But unluckily we haven't physically and culturally evolved with such maturity and rationality. So, conflict and jealousy and heart wrecks are inevitable.

Monogamy vs polygamy vs the extended family. All tend to devote themselves to either themselves or their progeny. Which is right? It must be defined by the individuals involved.

I think the idea of beign married to the same person for your entire life was easier during biblical times when the life expectancy was around 30.

Religion just steal and borrows from other sources. Marriage was around way before the old testament aka Tora. Many cultures have different views on marriage.
Love who you want just be honest about it with your partner(s).

Is it wrong to love?
Is love selfish?
I wonder where it comes from?
Thou shalt have no other gods before me?
I can't have a relationship, because I can't turn my back on some close female friends who need my help from time to time, these needs can last days, sometimes weeks and at one stage 3 years. As we get older we need more help. A broken hip, support through serious illness.
A selfish love does not permit this.

The Bachelor does it every season! lol

That's a pretty tough question, especially since there is no objective right, or wrong. We all have our own morality and can only judge right and wrong based on that. Having said that, the heart wants what the heart wants. It would be so much easier if we could simply choose who we love, but in my experiences, that's not how it works. However in my opinion, this notion of loving 2 different people at the same time is totally fine, as long as the others are ok with it as well. If 1 of the partners loves you, and only you, it would seem unfair to him that you just get to leave when his time is up, and go be physical with another person. Unless he already knew what he was getting into when he started the relationship, then that's on him. Other than that, I see no moral objections to following what your heart is telling you, as long as it doesnt intentionally hurt others. So if that's the case, more power to you!

No I don't. I see nothing wrong with pligomy. I would like 2 wived and a husband.

I think it's different for different people. I was monogamous by choice in two 16 year marriages. It was just the agreement we made with each other.And I was happy for most of those relationships.
Now that I've been divorced for a few years, I am dating quite a few women around the country. I have one that I truly love, but we don't live near each other. We are sexually free but emotionally committed to each other. The honesty is so powerful. I know that I have different loves for different people. I still love both my ex-wives, just don't live well together anymore.
I have to be honest with my partners. That's the only way that this works.
What I will want to do in the future, I can't tell you. I will probably decide when the situation arises.
I'm not jealous by nature. I don't get angry when I have fear of loss.

Have fun people.

I have come to feel that there is not "just one person" for each of us, and I think it highly unlikely that any "one person" can fill all of anyone's needs. That's why we seek friends, relationships, community. We seek out others to help fulfill our individual needs, and part of my needs is my reasoning that "I need to be needed." Any -- and every -- relationship is based on our hope that the other party will somehow help fill some need in our lives. If in seeking to fulfill those needs, one breaks a promise or 'cheats' then it becomes a problem, so in that case it could be "wrong".

jeez, I'm flat out finding one person to love, let alone more than that! But I don't give a bugger what the rest of you do as long as all parties involved are on the same page. Honesty and integrity.

It's very possible to love more than one person at a time, in often very different ways.

Could someone only love one of their children at a time? Why should it be any different to the way we love our romantic partners, friends, family.

When it comes to attraction, that's not something we can exert too much influence on. We can decide how we act on that attraction however.

I also have no issues with polyamorous or open relationships as long as all parties are in agreement. In our friendships we get different things from different people (e.g. one friend who is a great listener, one who is full of fun, one who is great at being the sensible one). Maybe physical or sensual relationships can be the same?

It depends on how far one takes that "love". Some people have "open marriages/relationships" insofar as the physical aspects go. Some (myself) don't. It's up to the couple, both of them. My late partner loved to flirt. That actually made me feel special. We had an understanding and seeing all these guys who wanted her (but couldn't have her) was gratifying. For love to be truly deep it has to be focused! A comment she sometimes made to me was "If you ever step out on me, no matter how difficult I will leave you". I didn't understand that as I had been cheated on at my first marriage and she knew how I felt about never doing that to another. Finally, as she was dying I got it; it was about facing life with a sense of reason and even death did not take away that sense. I think reason can make life's problems much more bearable than emotions. One added, item. I still love some of my previous partners. That will not change but my focus will only be on the one that is present.

Love is never wrong. Lying is another story.

Even secular western societies are largely monogamous (or at least serially monogamous). Monogamy came out of concerns about conserving property, and determining who fathered each child for the purposes of passing down that property. When you toss out that notion as nonsensical, especially since we have perfectly reliable ways of determining paternity now if we are concerned about it, there's no reason to buy into the monogamous mindset.

There is, though, a need to determine what you do believe or want once you've tossed that. Do you want to stay in a committed dyad, but with the option for either of you to have sex with others? (An open relationship.) What about limiting that outside sex to specific circumstances that you explore together? (Swinging.) Would you prefer being your own most significant other and building sexual/romantic relationships of varying intensity? (Solo polyamory). I could go on and on.

In the end, it only matters that you be ethical and loving, and that you establish healthy boundaries and encourage any partners to do the same.

We, the common people, only accept it because most don't have the resources. At the top of societies the rules are very different. And there are marked differences between different cultures. Perhaps there are also ethnic differences in female libido. The marital shell is a convenient shopfront. Interestingly enough there are several jurisdictions that allow polygyny but apparently there is none allowing polyandry. Weird world ...

The polyamory community believes you can love and have relationships with multiple people. It is a matter of open two way communication and acceptance. It is easier for some people to embrace than others. I had a hard time with it when I dabbled my toes in the water. I found it didn't fit my needs or desires. But I have many friends who practice it and it works well in their lives so more power to them. There is no wrong or right when it comes to consensual love. People will do what is best for them. Only you can make up your mind what works for you.

I believe people should be able to choose whatever they are comfortable with: monogamy, polyamory, swinging, etc. And not get harassed for it.

I suppose there are successful open relationships and friendly divorces, I don't personally know of any. I try not to judge. I cheated once after two years of marriage and thought I loved both. My wife would not tolerate it and I chose to stay with her. We were neither religious. She took me back but never truly forgave my indiscretion. We remained married for another 50 years until her death last year and I have lost my "other half". There are benefits to long term fidelity; for ourselves, our family and for society as a whole.

I don't know that fidelity is a "religious dogma". Perhaps some cultures force the suppression of jealousies that are part of the human condition. I suspect that these same problems, insecurities and jealousies exist in open relationships and in polygamous societies. Consider the "machismo" cultures in which a wife must tolerate "la otra" while her infidelity is justification for murder; Catholic societies all, yet not condoned by the Church. Certainly divorce is hard on children and generally a financial disaster for the wife.

The lady doth protest too much, methinks. Something in your personal life that sparks such vigorous protest?

I was in an open relationship with my wife for 11 years. If she hadn't got so messed up on drugs and alcohol we might still be married. We are still friends, and have been divorced for 18 years

I believe in loving one person romantically at a time. I don't share and that's simple. If I can't trust you to love me and only me in a romantic and intimate way, how can I trust you in General? If they come to feel that way after we are married, instant divorce.

Do what works for you and the people you're partnered with. I don't dictate what's right or wrong in relationships entered into by consenting adults, nor do I have any interest in anyone else evaluating mine.

I had never loved two people the same way. Even my children are loved individually by me because each human being despite being alike is unique. My take.